Chapter 5

AtthetimeofLilia’sdeathPhilipHerritonwasjusttwenty-fouryearsofage—indeedthenewsreachedSawstononhisbirthday.Hewasatall,weakly-builtyoungman,whoseclotheshadtobejudiciouslypaddedontheshouldersinordertomakehimpassmuster.Hisfacewasplainratherthannot,andtherewasacuriousmixtureinitofgoodandbad.Hehadafineforeheadandagoodlargenose,andbothobservationandsympathywereinhiseyes.Butbelowthenoseandeyesallwasconfusion,andthosepeoplewhobelievethatdestinyresidesinthemouthandchinshooktheirheadswhentheylookedathim. Philiphimself,asaboy,hadbeenkeenlyconsciousofthesedefects.Sometimeswhenhehadbeenbulliedorhustledaboutatschoolhewouldretiretohiscubicleandexaminehisfeaturesinalooking-glass,andhewouldsighandsay,“Itisaweakface.Ishallnevercarveaplaceformyselfintheworld.”Butasyearswentonhebecameeitherlessself-consciousormoreself-satisfied.Theworld,hefound,madeanicheforhimasitdidforeveryone.Decisionofcharactermightcomelater—orhemighthaveitwithoutknowing.Atalleventshehadgotasenseofbeautyandasenseofhumour,twomostdesirablegifts.Thesenseofbeautydevelopedfirst.Itcausedhimattheageoftwentytowearparti-colouredtiesandasquashyhat,tobelatefordinneronaccountofthesunset,andtocatchartfromBurne-JonestoPraxiteles.Attwenty-twohewenttoItalywithsomecousins,andthereheabsorbedintooneaestheticwholeolive-trees,bluesky,frescoes,countryinns,saints,peasants,mosaics,statues,beggars.HecamebackwiththeairofaprophetwhowouldeitherremodelSawstonorrejectit.Alltheenergiesandenthusiasmsofaratherfriendlesslifehadpassedintothechampionshipofbeauty. Inashorttimeitwasover.NothinghadhappenedeitherinSawstonorwithinhimself.Hehadshockedhalf-a-dozenpeople,squabbledwithhissister,andbickeredwithhismother.Heconcludedthatnothingcouldhappen,notknowingthathumanloveandloveoftruthsometimesconquerwhereloveofbeautyfails. Alittledisenchanted,alittletired,butaestheticallyintact,heresumedhisplacidlife,relyingmoreandmoreonhissecondgift,thegiftofhumour.Ifhecouldnotreformtheworld,hecouldatalleventslaughatit,thusattainingatleastanintellectualsuperiority.Laughter,hereadandbelieved,wasasignofgoodmoralhealth,andhelaughedoncontentedly,tillLilia’smarriagetoppledcontentmentdownforever.Italy,thelandofbeauty,wasruinedforhim.Shehadnopowertochangemenandthingswhodweltinher.She,too,couldproduceavarice,brutality,stupidity—and,whatwasworse,vulgarity.Itwasonhersoilandthroughherinfluencethatasillywomanhadmarriedacad.HehatedGino,thebetrayerofhislife’sideal,andnowthatthesordidtragedyhadcome,itfilledhimwithpangs,notofsympathy,butoffinaldisillusion. ThedisillusionwasconvenientforMrs.Herriton,whosawatryinglittleperiodaheadofher,andwasgladtohaveherfamilyunited. “Arewetogointomourning,doyouthink?”Shealwaysaskedherchildren’sadvicewherepossible. Harrietthoughtthattheyshould.ShehadbeendetestabletoLiliawhileshelived,butshealwaysfeltthatthedeaddeserveattentionandsympathy.“Afterallshehassuffered.Thatletterkeptmeawakefornights.Thewholethingislikeoneofthosehorriblemodernplayswherenooneisin‘theright.’Butifwehavemourning,itwillmeantellingIrma.” “OfcoursewemusttellIrma!”saidPhilip. “Ofcourse,”saidhismother.“ButIthinkwecanstillnottellheraboutLilia’smarriage.” “Idon’tthinkthat.Andshemusthavesuspectedsomethingbynow.” “Soonewouldhavesupposed.Butshenevercaredforhermother,andlittlegirlsofninedon’treasonclearly.Shelooksonitasalongvisit.Anditisimportant,mostimportant,thatsheshouldnotreceiveashock.Allachild’slifedependsontheidealithasofitsparents.Destroythatandeverythinggoes—morals,behaviour,everything.Absolutetrustinsomeoneelseistheessenceofeducation.ThatiswhyIhavebeensocarefulabouttalkingofpoorLiliabeforeher.” “Butyouforgetthiswretchedbaby.WatersandAdamsonwritethatthereisababy.” “Mrs.Theobaldmustbetold.Butshedoesn’tcount.Sheisbreakingupveryquickly.Shedoesn’tevenseeMr.Kingcroftnow.He,thankgoodness,Ihear,hasatlastconsoledhimselfwithsomeoneelse.” “Thechildmustknowsometime,”persistedPhilip,whofeltalittledispleased,thoughhecouldnottellwithwhat. “Thelaterthebetter.Everymomentsheisdeveloping.” “Imustsayitseemsratherhardluck,doesn’tit?” “OnIrma?Why?” “Onus,perhaps.Wehavemoralsandbehaviouralso,andIdon’tthinkthiscontinualsecrecyimprovesthem.” “There’snoneedtotwistthethingroundtothat,”saidHarriet,ratherdisturbed. “Ofcoursethereisn’t,”saidhermother.“Let’skeeptothemainissue.Thisbaby’squitebesidethepoint.Mrs.Theobaldwilldonothing,andit’snoconcernofours.” “Itwillmakeadifferenceinthemoney,surely,”saidhe. “No,dearverylittle.PoorCharlesprovidedforeverykindofcontingencyinhiswill.ThemoneywillcometoyouandHarriet,asIrma’sguardians.” “Good.DoestheItaliangetanything?” “Hewillgetallhers.Butyouknowwhatthatis.” “Good.Sothoseareourtactics—totellnooneaboutthebaby,notevenMissAbbott.” “Mostcertainlythisisthepropercourse,”saidMrs.Herriton,preferring“course”to“tactics”forHarriet’ssake.“AndwhyevershouldwetellCaroline?” “Shewassomixedupintheaffair.” “Poorsillycreature.Thelessshehearsaboutitthebettershewillbepleased.IhavecometobeverysorryforCaroline.She,ifanyone,hassufferedandbeenpenitent.SheburstintotearswhenItoldheralittle,onlyalittle,ofthatterribleletter.Ineversawsuchgenuineremorse.Wemustforgiveherandforget.Letthedeadburytheirdead.Wewillnottroubleherwiththem.” Philipsawthathismotherwasscarcelylogical.Buttherewasnoadvantageinsayingso.“HerebeginneththeNewLife,then.Doyouremember,mother,thatwaswhatwesaidwhenwesawLiliaoff?” “Yes,dearbutnowitisreallyaNewLife,becauseweareallataccord.ThenyouwerestillinfatuatedwithItaly.Itmaybefullofbeautifulpicturesandchurches,butwecannotjudgeacountrybyanythingbutitsmen.” “Thatisquitetrue,”hesaidsadly.Andasthetacticswerenowsettled,hewentoutandtookanaimlessandsolitarywalk. Bythetimehecamebacktwoimportantthingshadhappened.Irmahadbeentoldofhermother’sdeath,andMissAbbott,whohadcalledforasubscription,hadbeentoldalso. Irmahadweptloudly,hadaskedafewsensiblequestionsandagoodmanysillyones,andhadbeencontentwithevasiveanswers.Fortunatelytheschoolprize-givingwasathand,andthat,togetherwiththeprospectofnewblackclothes,keptherfrommeditatingonthefactthatLilia,whohadbeenabsentsolong,wouldnowbeabsentforever. “AsforCaroline,”saidMrs.Herriton,“Iwasalmostfrightened.Shebrokedownutterly.Shecriedevenwhensheleftthehouse.IcomfortedherasbestIcould,andIkissedher.Itissomethingth