CHAPTER XXVIII

tairsleadingtoherflattwostepsatatime,anditnevercrossedhismindthatshemightnotbeathome.Asherangherbell,heseemedtohimselftobeannouncingthepresenceofsomethingwonderfulthatwasseparatefromhimself,andgavehimpowerandauthorityoverallotherpeople.Marycametothedoorafteramoment’spause.Hewasperfectlysilent,andintheduskhisfacelookedcompletelywhite.Hefollowedherintoherroom. “Doyouknoweachother?”shesaid,tohisextremesurprise,forhehadcountedonfindingheralone.Ayoungmanrose,andsaidthatheknewRalphbysight. “Wewerejustgoingthroughsomepapers,”saidMary.“Mr.Basnetthastohelpme,becauseIdon’tknowmuchaboutmyworkyet.It’sthenewsociety,”sheexplained.“I’mthesecretary.I’mnolongeratRussellSquare.” Thevoiceinwhichshegavethisinformationwassoconstrainedastosoundalmostharsh. “Whatareyouraims?”saidRalph.HelookedneitheratMarynoratMr.Basnett.Mr.BasnettthoughthehadseldomseenamoredisagreeableorformidablemanthanthisfriendofMary’s,thissarcastic-looking,white-facedMr.Denham,whoseemedtodemand,asifbyright,anaccountoftheirproposals,andtocriticizethembeforehehadheardthem.Nevertheless,heexplainedhisprojectsasclearlyashecould,andknewthathewishedMr.Denhamtothinkwellofthem. “Isee,”saidRalph,whenhehaddone.“D’youknow,Mary,”hesuddenlyremarked,“IbelieveI’minforacold.Haveyouanyquinine?”Thelookwhichhecastatherfrightenedheritexpressedmutely,perhapswithouthisownconsciousness,somethingdeep,wild,andpassionate.Shelefttheroomatonce.HerheartbeatfastattheknowledgeofRalph’spresencebutitbeatwithpain,andwithanextraordinaryfear.Shestoodlisteningforamomenttothevoicesinthenextroom. “Ofcourse,Iagreewithyou,”sheheardRalphsay,inthisstrangevoice,toMr.Basnett.“Butthere’smorethatmightbedone.HaveyouseenJudson,forinstance?Youshouldmakeapointofgettinghim.” Maryreturnedwiththequinine. “Judson’saddress?”Mr.Basnettinquired,pullingouthisnotebookandpreparingtowrite.Fortwentyminutes,perhaps,hewrotedownnames,addresses,andothersuggestionsthatRalphdictatedtohim.Then,whenRalphfellsilent,Mr.Basnettfeltthathispresencewasnotdesired,andthankingRalphforhishelp,withasensethathewasveryyoungandignorantcomparedwithhim,hesaidgood-bye. “Mary,”saidRalph,directlyMr.Basnetthadshutthedoorandtheywerealonetogether.“Mary,”herepeated.ButtheolddifficultyofspeakingtoMarywithoutreservepreventedhimfromcontinuing.HisdesiretoproclaimhisloveforKatharinewasstillstronginhim,buthehadfelt,directlyhesawMary,thathecouldnotshareitwithher.ThefeelingincreasedashesattalkingtoMr.Basnett.AndyetallthetimehewasthinkingofKatharine,andmarvelingathislove.ThetoneinwhichhespokeMary’snamewasharsh. “Whatisit,Ralph?”sheasked,startledbyhistone.Shelookedathimanxiously,andherlittlefrownshowedthatshewastryingpainfullytounderstandhim,andwaspuzzled.Hecouldfeelhergropingforhismeaning,andhewasannoyedwithher,andthoughthowhehadalwaysfoundherslow,painstaking,andclumsy.Hehadbehavedbadlytoher,too,whichmadehisirritationthemoreacute.Withoutwaitingforhimtoanswer,sheroseasifhisanswerwereindifferenttoher,andbegantoputinordersomepapersthatMr.Basnetthadleftonthetable.Shehummedascrapofatuneunderherbreath,andmovedabouttheroomasifshewereoccupiedinmakingthingstidy,andhadnootherconcern. “You’llstayanddine?”shesaidcasually,returningtoherseat. “No,”Ralphreplied.Shedidnotpresshimfurther.Theysatsidebysidewithoutspeaking,andMaryreachedherhandforherworkbasket,andtookouthersewingandthreadedaneedle. “That’sacleveryoungman,”Ralphobserved,referringtoMr.Basnett. “I’mgladyouthoughtso.It’stremendouslyinterestingwork,andconsideringeverything,Ithinkwe’vedoneverywell.ButI’minclinedtoagreewithyouweoughttotrytobemoreconciliatory.We’reabsurdlystrict.It’sdifficulttoseethattheremaybesenseinwhatone’sopponentssay,thoughtheyareone’sopponents.HoraceBasnettiscertainlytoouncompromising.Imustn’tforgettoseethathewritesthatlettertoJudson.You’retoobusy,Isuppose,tocomeontoourcommittee?”Shespokeinthemostimpersonalmanner. “Imaybeoutoftown,”Ralphreplied,withequaldistanceofmanner. “Ourexecutivemeetseveryweek,ofcourse,”sheobserved.“Butsomeofourmembersdon’tcomemorethanonceamonth.MembersofParliamentaretheworstitwasamistake,Ithink,toaskthem.” Shewentonsewinginsilence. “You’venottakenyourquinine,”shesaid,lookingupandseeingthetabloidsuponthemantelpiece. “Idon’twantit,”saidRalphshortly. “Well,youknowbest,”sherepliedtranquilly. “Mary,I’mabrute!”heexclaimed.“HereIcomeandwasteyourtime,anddonothingbutmakemyselfdisagreeable.” “Acoldcomingondoesmakeonefeelwretched,”shereplied. “I’venotgotacold.Thatwasalie.There’snothingthematterwithme.I’mmad,Isuppose.Ioughttohavehadthedecencytokeepaway.ButIwantedtoseeyou—Iwantedtotellyou—I’minlove,Mary.”Hespoketheword,but,ashespokeit,itseemedrobbedofsubstance. “Inlove,areyou?”shesaidquietly.“I’mglad,Ralph.” “IsupposeI’minlove.Anyhow,I’moutofmymind.Ican’tthink,Ican’twork,Idon’tcareahangforanythingintheworld.GoodHeavens,Mary!I’mintorment!OnemomentI’mhappynextI’mmiserable.IhateherforhalfanhourthenI’dgivemywholelifetobewithherfortenminutesallthetimeIdon’tknowwhatIfeel,orwhyIfeelitit’sinsanity,andyetit’sperfectlyreasonable.Canyouma