CHAPTER XXIV

asmmostelaboratelyscratchedoutinplaces,butenoughwaswrittenplaintogratifyWilliam’svanityexceedingly.Shewasquiteintelligentenoughtosaytherightthings,or,evenmorecharmingly,tohintatthem.Inotherways,too,itwasaverycharmingletter.Shetoldhimabouthermusic,andaboutaSuffragemeetingtowhichHenryhadtakenher,andsheasserted,halfseriously,thatshehadlearnttheGreekalphabet,andfoundit“fascinating.”Thewordwasunderlined.Hadshelaughedwhenshedrewthatline?Wassheeverserious?Didn’tthelettershowthemostengagingcompoundofenthusiasmandspiritandwhimsicality,alltaperingintoaflameofgirlishfreakishness,whichflitted,fortherestofthemorning,asawill-o’-the-wisp,acrossRodney’slandscape.Hecouldnotresistbeginningananswertoherthereandthen.Hefounditparticularlydelightfultoshapeastylewhichshouldexpressthebowingandcurtsying,advancingandretreating,whicharecharacteristicofoneofthemanymillionpartnershipsofmenandwomen.Katharinenevertrodthatparticularmeasure,hecouldnothelpreflectingKatharine—CassandraCassandra—Katharine—theyalternatedinhisconsciousnessalldaylong.Itwasallverywelltodressoneselfcarefully,composeone’sface,andstartoffpunctuallyathalf-pastfourtoatea-partyinCheyneWalk,butHeavenonlyknewwhatwouldcomeofitall,andwhenKatharine,aftersittingsilentwithherusualimmobility,wantonlydrewfromherpocketandslappeddownonthetablebeneathhiseyesaletteraddressedtoCassandraherself,hiscomposuredesertedhim.Whatdidshemeanbyherbehavior? Helookedupsharplyfromhisrowoflittlepictures.KatharinewasdisposingoftheAmericanladyinfartooarbitraryafashion.Surelythevictimherselfmustseehowfoolishherenthusiasmsappearedintheeyesofthepoet’sgranddaughter.Katharinenevermadeanyattempttosparepeople’sfeelings,hereflectedand,beinghimselfverysensitivetoallshadesofcomfortanddiscomfort,hecutshorttheauctioneer’scatalog,whichKatharinewasreelingoffmoreandmoreabsent-mindedly,andtookMrs.VermontBankes,withaqueersenseoffellowshipinsuffering,underhisownprotection. ButwithinafewminutestheAmericanladyhadcompletedherinspection,andincliningherheadinalittlenodofreverentialfarewelltothepoetandhisshoes,shewasescorteddownstairsbyRodney.Katharinestayedbyherselfinthelittleroom.Theceremonyofancestor-worshiphadbeenmorethanusuallyoppressivetoher.Moreover,theroomwasbecomingcrowdedbeyondtheboundsoforder.Onlythatmorningaheavilyinsuredproof-sheethadreachedthemfromacollectorinAustralia,whichrecordedachangeofthepoet’smindaboutaveryfamousphrase,and,therefore,hadclaimstothehonorofglazingandframing.Butwasthereroomforit?Mustitbehungonthestaircase,orshouldsomeotherrelicgiveplacetodoithonor?Feelingunabletodecidethequestion,Katharineglancedattheportraitofhergrandfather,asiftoaskhisopinion.Theartistwhohadpainteditwasnowoutoffashion,andbydintofshowingittovisitors,Katharinehadalmostceasedtoseeanythingbutaglowoffaintlypleasingpinkandbrowntints,enclosedwithinacircularscrollofgiltlaurel-leaves.Theyoungmanwhowashergrandfatherlookedvaguelyoverherhead.Thesensuallipswereslightlyparted,andgavethefaceanexpressionofbeholdingsomethinglovelyormiraculousvanishingorjustrisingupontherimofthedistance.TheexpressionrepeateditselfcuriouslyuponKatharine’sfaceasshegazedupintohis.Theywerethesameage,orverynearlyso.Shewonderedwhathewaslookingforweretherewavesbeatinguponashoreforhim,too,shewondered,andheroesridingthroughtheleaf-hungforests?Forperhapsthefirsttimeinherlifeshethoughtofhimasaman,young,unhappy,tempestuous,fullofdesiresandfaultsforthefirsttimesherealizedhimforherself,andnotfromhermother’smemory.Hemighthavebeenherbrother,shethought.Itseemedtoherthattheywereakin,withthemysteriouskinshipofbloodwhichmakesitseempossibletointerpretthesightswhichtheeyesofthedeadbeholdsointently,oreventobelievethattheylookwithusuponourpresentjoysandsorrows.Hewouldhaveunderstood,shethought,suddenlyandinsteadoflayingherwitheredflowersuponhisshrine,shebroughthimherownperplexities—perhapsagiftofgreatervalue,shouldthedeadbeconsciousofgifts,thanflowersandincenseandadoration.Doubts,questionings,anddespondenciesshefelt,asshelookedup,wouldbemorewelcometohimthanhomage,andhewouldholdthembutaverysmallburdenifshegavehim,also,someshareinwhatshesufferedandachieved.Thedepthofherownprideandlovewerenotmoreapparenttoherthanthesensethatthedeadaskedneitherflowersnorregrets,butashareinthelifewhichtheyhadgivenher,thelifewhichtheyhadlived. Rodneyfoundheramomentlatersittingbeneathhergrandfather’sportrait.Shelaidherhandontheseatnextherinafriendlyway,andsaid: “Comeandsitdown,William.HowgladIwasyouwerehere!Ifeltmyselfgettingruderandruder.” “Youarenotgoodathidingyourfeelings,”hereturneddryly. “Oh,don’tscoldme—I’vehadahorridafternoon.”ShetoldhimhowshehadtakentheflowerstoMrs.McCormick,andhowSouthKensingtonimpressedherasthepreserveofofficers’widows.Shedescribedhowthedoorhadopened,andwhatgloomyavenuesofbustsandpalm-treesandumbrellashadbeenrevealedtoher.Shespokelightly,andsucceededinputtinghimathisease.Indeed,herapidlybecametoomuchathiseasetopersistinaconditionofcheerfulneutrality.Hefelthiscomposureslippingfromhim.Katharinemadeitseemsonaturaltoaskhertohelphim,oradvisehim,tosaystraightoutwhathehadinhismind.TheletterfromCassandrawasheavyinhispocket.TherewasalsothelettertoCassandralyingonthetableinthenextroom.TheatmosphereseemedchargedwithCassandra.But,unlessKatharinebeganthesubjectofherownaccord,hecouldnotevenhint—hemustignorethewholeaffairitwasthepartofagentlemantopreserveabearingthatwas,asfarashecouldmakeit,thebearingofanundoubtinglover.Atintervalshesigheddeeply.HetalkedrathermorequicklythanusualaboutthepossibilitythatsomeoftheoperasofMozartwouldbeplayedinthesummer.Hehadreceivedanotice,hesaid,andatonceproducedapocket-bookstuffedwithpapers,andbeganshufflingtheminsearch.Heheldathickenvelopebetweenhisfingerandthumb,asifthenoticefromtheoperacompanyhadbecomeinsomewayinseparablyattachedtoit. “AletterfromCassandra?”saidKatharine,intheeasiestvoiceintheworld,lookingoverhisshoulder.“I’vejustwrittentoaskhertocomehere,onlyIforgottopostit.” Hehandedhertheenvelopeinsilence.Shetookit,extractedthesheets,andreadtheletterthrough. ThereadingseemedtoRodneytotakeanintolerablylongtime. “Yes,”sheobservedatlength,“averycharmingletter.” Rodney’sfacewashalfturnedaway,asifinbashfulness.Herviewofhisprofilealmostmovedhertolaughter.Sheglancedthroughthepagesoncemore. “Iseenoharm,”Williamblurtedout,“inhelpingher—withGreek,forexample—ifshereallycaresforthatsortofthing.” “There’snoreasonwhysheshouldn’tcare,”saidKatharine,consultingthepagesoncemore.“Infact—ah,hereitis—‘TheGreekalphabetisabsolutelyfascinating.’Obviouslyshedoescare.” “Well,Greekmayberatheralargeorder.IwasthinkingchieflyofEnglish.Hercriticismsofmyplay,thoughthey’retoogenerous,evidentlyimmature—shecan’tbemorethantwenty-two,Isuppose?—theycertainlyshowthesortofthingonewants:realfeelingforpoetry,understanding,notformed,ofcourse,butit’sattherootofeverythingafterall.There’dbenoharminlendingherbooks?” “No.Certainlynot.” “Butifit—hum—ledtoacorrespondence?Imean,Katharine,Itakeit,withoutgoingintomatterswhichseemtomealittlemorbid,Imean,”hefloundered,“you,fromyourpointofview,feelthatthere’snothingdisagreeabletoyouinthenotion?Ifso,you’veonlytospeak,andIneverthinkofitagain.” Shewassurprisedbytheviolenceofherdesirethathenevershouldthinkofitagain.Foraninstantitseemedtoherimpossibletosurrenderanintimacy,whichmightnotbetheintimacyoflove,butwascertainlytheintimacyoftruefriendship,toanywomanintheworld.Cassandrawouldneverunderstandhim—shewasnotgoodenoughforhim.Theletterseemedtoheraletterofflattery—aletteraddressedtohisweakness,whichitmadeherangrytothinkwasknowntoanother.Forhewasnotweakhehadtherarestrengthofdoingwhathepromised—shehadonlytospeak,andhewouldneverthinkofCassandraagain. Shepaused.Rodneyguessedthereason.Hewasamazed. “Shelovesme,”hethought.Thewomanheadmiredmorethananyoneintheworld,lovedhim,ashehadgivenuphopethatshewouldeverlovehim.Andnowthatforthefirsttimehewassureofherlove,heresentedit.Hefeltitasafetter,anencumbrance,somethingwhichmadethemboth,buthiminparticular,ridiculous.Hewasinherpowercomp