Chapter XXV
關燈
小
中
大
earninganditcan’thurtyourfeelingswhenIsaythatyou’reutterlyignorant.Idon’tthinkitshonesttotakeapositionyou’renotcompetenttofill.”
“Me—notcompetent?”criedEdward,withsurprise.“That’sagoodone!Uponmyword,I’mnotgiventoboasting,butImustsayIthinkmyselfcompetenttodomostthings....YoujustaskoldBacotwhathethinksofme,andthat’llopenyoureyes.Thefactis,everyoneappreciatesmebutyou:buttheysayaman’sneveraherotohisvalet.”
“Yourproverbismostapt,dearEdward....ButIhavenointentionofthwartingyouinanyofyourplans.Ionlythoughtyoudidnotknowwhatyouweregoinginfor,andthatImightsaveyoufromsomehumiliation.”
“Humiliation,where?Pooh,youthinkIshan’tgetelected.Well,lookhere,IbetyouanymoneyyoulikethatIshallcomeouttopofthepoll.”
NextdayEdwardwrotetoMr.BacotexpressingpleasurethathewasabletofallinwiththeviewsoftheConservativeAssociationandBertha,whoknewthatnoargumentcouldturnhimfromhispurpose,determinedtocoachhim,sothatheshouldnotmaketooarrantafoolofhimself.HerfearswereproportionatetoherestimateofEdward’sability!ShesenttoLondonforpamphletsandblue-booksontherightsanddutiesoftheCountyCouncil,andbeggedEdwardtoreadthem.Butinhisself-confidentmannerhepooh-poohedher,andlaughedwhenshereadthemherselfsoastobeabletoteachhim.
“Idon’twanttoknowallthatrot,”hecried.“Allamanwantsisgumption.Why,d’yousupposeamanwhogoesinforparliamentknowsanythingaboutpolitics?Ofcoursehedoesn’t.”
Berthawasindignantthatherhusbandshouldbesowellsatisfiedinhisilliteracy,andthathestoutlyrefusedtolearn.Itisonlywhenamanknowsagooddealthathediscovershowunfathomableishisignorance.Edward,knowingsolittle,wasconvincedthattherewaslittletoknow,andconsequentlyfeltquiteassuredthatheknewallwhichwasnecessary.Hemightmoreeasilyhavebeenpersuadedthatthemoonwasmadeofgreencheesethanthathelackedtheveryrudimentsofknowledge.
TheCountyCouncilelectionsinLondonwerealsobeingheldatthattime,andBertha,hopingtogiveEdwardusefulhints,diligentlyreadtheoratorywhichtheyoccasioned.Butherefusedtolisten.
“Idon’twanttocribothermen’sstuff.I’mgoingtotalkonmyown.”
“Whydon’tyouwriteoutaspeechandgetitbyheart?”
Berthafanciedthatsoshemightinfluencehimalittleandspareherselfandhimthehumiliationofutterridicule.
“OldBacotsayswhenhemakesaspeech,healwaystruststothespurofthemoment.HesaysthatFoxmadehisbestspeecheswhenhewasblinddrunk.”
“D’youknowwhoFoxwas?”askedBertha.
“Someoldbufferorotherwhomadespeeches.”
ThedayarrivedwhenEdwardforthefirsttimewastoaddresshisconstituents,intheBlackstabletown-hallandforaweekpastplacardshadbeenpastedoneverywallanddisplayedineveryshop,announcingthegladnews.Mr.BacotcametoCourtLeys,rubbinghishands.
“Weshallhavea