Chapter XXIII

g.“Ididn’tmindatall.” “That’sallright.OfcourseI’dneverbeentoLordPhilip’sbefore,andIcouldn’twirethelastminutetosaythatmywifewascominghomeandIhadtomeether.” “Ofcoursenotitwouldhavemadeyouappeartooabsurd.” “ButIwasjollysick,Icantellyou.Ifyou’donlyletmeknowaweekagothatyouwerecoming,Ishouldhaverefusedtheinvitation.” “MydearEdward,I’msounpractical,Ineverknowmyownmind,andI’malwaysdoingthingsonthespurofthemoment,tomyowninconvenienceandotherpeople’s.AndIshouldneverhaveexpectedyoutodenyyourselfanythingformysake.” Bertha,perplexed,almostdismayed,lookedatherhusbandwithastonishment.Shescarcelyrecognisedhim.InthethreeyearsoftheircommonlifeBerthahadnoticednochangeinhim,andwithhergreatfacultyforidealisation,hadcarriedinhermindalwayshisimage,asheappearedwhenfirstshesawhim,theslender,manlyyouthofeight-and-twenty.MissLeyhaddiscernedalterations,andspitefulfemininetongueshadsaidthathewasgoingoffdreadfully.Buthiswifehadseennothing.Andtheseparationhadgivenfurtheropportunitiestoherfantasy.Inabsenceshehadthoughtofhimasthehandsomestofmen,delightingoverhisclearfeatures,hisfairhair,hisinexhaustibleyouthandstrength.TheplainfactswouldhavedisappointedherevenifEdwardhadretainedthelooksofhisyouth,butseeingnowaswelltheotherchanges,theshockwasextreme.Itwasadifferentmanshesaw,almostastranger.Craddockdidnotwearwellthoughbutthirty-one,helookedmucholder.Hehadbroadenedandputonflesh,hisfeatureshadlosttheirdelicacy,andtheredofhischeekswasgrowingcoarse.Heworehisclothesinaslovenlyfashion,andhadfallenintoalumberingwalkasifhisbootswerealwaysheavywithclayandtherewasinhim,besides,theheartinessandintolerantjovialityoftheprosperousfarmer.Edward’sgoodlookshadgivenBerthathekeenestpleasure,andnow,rushing,aswasherhabit,totheotherextreme,shefoundhimalmostugly.Thiswasanexaggeration,forthoughhewasnolongertheslimyouthofherfirstacquaintance,hewasstill,inaheavy,massiveway,betterlookingthanthemajorityofmen. Edwardkissedherwithmaritalcalm,andthepropinquitywaftedtoBertha’snostrilsthestrongscentsofthefarmyard,which,nomatterwhathisclothes,hungperpetuallyabouthim.Sheturnedaway,hardlyconcealingalittleshiverofdisgust.Yettheywerethesamemasculineodoursasoncehadmadehernearlyfaintwithdesire.