Chapter XXII

關燈
tcanyouwantmebackfor?YouhaveCourtLeysandyourfarms.EveryonelikesyouintheneighbourhoodIwastheonlybartoyourcompletehappiness.CourtLeysIfreelygiveyouformylifeuntilyoucameitbroughtinnothing,andtheincomenowarisingfromitisentirelyduetoyoureffortsyouearnitandIbegyoutokeepit.FormethesmallincomeIhavefrommymotherissufficient. AuntPollystillthinksIamonavisit,andconstantlyspeaksofyou.Ithrowdustinhereyes,butIcannothopetokeepherinignoranceforlong.AtpresentIamengagedinperiodicallyseeingthedoctorforanimaginaryill,andgettingoneortwonewthings. Shallwewritetooneanotheronceaweek?IknowwritingisatroubletoyoubutIdonotwishyoutoforgetmealtogether.Ifyoulike,IwillwritetoyoueverySunday,andyoumayanswerornotasyouplease. BERTHA. P.S.—Pleasedonotthinkofanyrapprochement.Iam sureyouwilleventuallyseethatwearebothmuchhappier apart. 72EliotMansions,Chelsea,S.W. May15. MydearEddie,—Iwaspleasedtogetyourletter.Iamalittletouchedatyourwantingtoseeme.Yousuggestcomingtotown—perhapsitisfortunatethatIshallbenolongerhere.Ifyouhadexpressedsuchawishbefore,muchmighthavegonedifferently. AuntPollyhavingletherflattofriends,goestoParisfortherestoftheseason.Shestartsto-night,andIhaveofferedtoaccompanyher.IamsickofLondon.Idonotknowwhethershesuspectsanything,butInoticethatnowshenevermentionsyourname.ShelookedalittlescepticaltheotherdaywhenIexplainedthatIhadlongwishedtogotoParis,andthatyouwerehavingtheinsideofCourtLeyspainted.Fortunately,however,shemakesitapracticenottoinquireintootherpeople’sbusiness,andIcanrestassuredthatshewillneveraskmeasinglequestion. Forgivetheshortnessofthisletter,butIamverybusy,packing.—Youraffectionatewife, BERTHA. 41RuedesEcoliers,Paris, May16. MydearestEddie,—Ihavebeenunkindtoyou.Itisniceofyoutowanttoseeme,andmyrepugnancetoitwasperhapsunnatural.Onthinkingitover,Icannotthinkitwilldoanyharmifweshouldseeoneanother.Ofcourse,IcannevercomebacktoCourtLeys—therearesomechainsthathavingbrokenyoucanneverweldtogetherandnofettersaresointolerableasthefettersoflove.ButifyouwanttoseemeIwillputnoobstacleinyourwayIwillnotdenythatIalsoshouldliketoseeyou.Iamfartherawaynow,butifyoucareformeatallyouwillnothesitatetomaketheshortjourney. Wehavehereaveryniceapartment,intheLatinQuarter,awayfromtherichpeopleandthetourists.Idonotknowwhichismorevulgar,theaveragetripperorthepartofPariswhichheinfests:Imustsaytheybecomeoneanotherto