CHAPTER VIII.

onalfluctuations,kepthiswillbentinthedirectionofacompleteavowaltohisfather,andhewithheldthestoryofWildfire’slosstillthenextmorning,thatitmightservehimasanintroductiontoheaviermatter.TheoldSquirewasaccustomedtohisson’sfrequentabsencefromhome,andthoughtneitherDunstan’snorWildfire’snon-appearanceamattercallingforremark.Godfreysaidtohimselfagainandagain,thatifheletslipthisoneopportunityofconfession,hemightneverhaveanothertherevelationmightbemadeeveninamoreodiouswaythanbyDunstan’smalignity:shemightcomeasshehadthreatenedtodo.Andthenhetriedtomakethesceneeasiertohimselfbyrehearsal:hemadeuphismindhowhewouldpassfromtheadmissionofhisweaknessinlettingDunstanhavethemoneytothefactthatDunstanhadaholdonhimwhichhehadbeenunabletoshakeoff,andhowhewouldworkuphisfathertoexpectsomethingverybadbeforehetoldhimthefact.TheoldSquirewasanimplacableman:hemaderesolutionsinviolentanger,andhewasnottobemovedfromthemafterhisangerhadsubsided—asfieryvolcanicmatterscoolandhardenintorock.Likemanyviolentandimplacablemen,heallowedevilstogrowunderfavourofhisownheedlessness,tilltheypresseduponhimwithexasperatingforce,andthenheturnedroundwithfierceseverityandbecameunrelentinglyhard.Thiswashissystemwithhistenants:heallowedthemtogetintoarrears,neglecttheirfences,reducetheirstock,selltheirstraw,andotherwisegothewrongway,—andthen,whenhebecameshortofmoneyinconsequenceofthisindulgence,hetookthehardestmeasuresandwouldlistentonoappeal.Godfreyknewallthis,andfeltitwiththegreaterforcebecausehehadconstantlysufferedannoyancefromwitnessinghisfather’ssuddenfitsofunrelentingness,forwhichhisownhabitualirresolutiondeprivedhimofallsympathy.(Hewasnotcriticalonthefaultyindulgencewhichprecededthesefitsthatseemedtohimnaturalenough.)Stilltherewasjustthechance,Godfreythought,thathisfather’spridemightseethismarriageinalightthatwouldinducehimtohushitup,ratherthanturnhissonoutandmakethefamilythetalkofthecountryfortenmilesround. ThiswastheviewofthecasethatGodfreymanagedtokeepbeforehimprettycloselytillmidnight,andhewenttosleepthinkingthathehaddonewithinwarddebating.Butwhenheawokeinthestillmorningdarknesshefounditimpossibletoreawakenhiseveningthoughtsitwasasiftheyhadbeentiredoutandwerenottoberousedtofurtherwork.Insteadofargumentsforconfession,hecouldnowfeelthepresenceofnothingbutitsevilconsequences:theolddreadofdisgracecameback—theoldshrinkingfromthethoughtofraisingahopelessbarrierbetweenhimselfandNancy—theolddispositiontorelyonchanceswhichmightbefavourabletohim,andsavehimfrombetrayal.Why,afterall,shouldhecutoffthehopeofthembyhisownact?Hehadseenthematterinawronglightyesterday.HehadbeeninaragewithDunstan,andhadthoughtofnothingbutathoroughbreak-upoftheirmutualunderstandingbutwhatitwouldbereallywisestforhimtodo,wastotryandsoftenhisfather’sangeragainstDunsey,andkeepthingsasnearlyaspossibleintheiroldcondition.IfDunseydidnotcomebackforafewdays(andGodfreydidnotknowbutthattherascalhadenoughmoneyinhispockettoenablehimtokeepawaystilllonger),everythingmightblowover.