VIII

Icouldn’tsleepallnightafoghornwasgroaningincessantlyontheSound,andItossedhalf-sickbetweengrotesquerealityandsavage,frighteningdreams.TowarddawnIheardataxigoupGatsby’sdrive,andimmediatelyIjumpedoutofbedandbegantodress—IfeltthatIhadsomethingtotellhim,somethingtowarnhimabout,andmorningwouldbetoolate. Crossinghislawn,Isawthathisfrontdoorwasstillopenandhewasleaningagainstatableinthehall,heavywithdejectionorsleep. “Nothinghappened,”hesaidwanly.“Iwaited,andaboutfouro’clockshecametothewindowandstoodthereforaminuteandthenturnedoutthelight.” Hishousehadneverseemedsoenormoustomeasitdidthatnightwhenwehuntedthroughthegreatroomsforcigarettes.Wepushedasidecurtainsthatwerelikepavilions,andfeltoverinnumerablefeetofdarkwallforelectriclightswitches—onceItumbledwithasortofsplashuponthekeysofaghostlypiano.Therewasaninexplicableamountofdusteverywhere,andtheroomsweremusty,asthoughtheyhadn’tbeenairedformanydays.Ifoundthehumidoronanunfamiliartable,withtwostale,drycigarettesinside.ThrowingopentheFrenchwindowsofthedrawing-room,wesatsmokingoutintothedarkness. “Yououghttogoaway,”Isaid.“It’sprettycertainthey’lltraceyourcar.” “Goawaynow,oldsport?” “GotoAtlanticCityforaweek,oruptoMontreal.” Hewouldn’tconsiderit.Hecouldn’tpossiblyleaveDaisyuntilheknewwhatshewasgoingtodo.HewasclutchingatsomelasthopeandIcouldn’tbeartoshakehimfree. ItwasthisnightthathetoldmethestrangestoryofhisyouthwithDanCody—toldittomebecause“JayGatsby”hadbrokenuplikeglassagainstTom’shardmalice,andthelongsecretextravaganzawasplayedout.Ithinkthathewouldhaveacknowledgedanythingnow,withoutreserve,buthewantedtotalkaboutDaisy. Shewasthefirst“nice”girlhehadeverknown.Invariousunrevealedcapacitieshehadcomeincontactwithsuchpeople,butalwayswithindiscerniblebarbedwirebetween.Hefoundherexcitinglydesirable.Hewenttoherhouse,atfirstwithotherofficersfromCampTaylor,thenalone.Itamazedhim—hehadneverbeeninsuchabeautifulhousebefore.Butwhatgaveitanairofbreathlessintensity,wasthatDaisylivedthere—itwasascasualathingtoherashistentoutatcampwastohim.Therewasaripemysteryaboutit,ahintofbedroomsupstairsmorebeautifulandcoolthanotherbedrooms,ofgayandradiantactivitiestakingplacethroughitscorridors,andofromancesthatwerenotmustyandlaidawayalreadyinlavenderbutfreshandbreathingandredolentofthisyear’sshiningmotorcarsandofdanceswhoseflowerswerescarcelywithered.Itexcitedhim,too,thatmanymenhadalreadylovedDaisy—itincreasedhervalueinhiseyes.Hefelttheirpresenceallaboutthehouse,pervadingtheairwiththeshadesandechoesofstillvibrantemotions. ButheknewthathewasinDaisy’shousebyacolossalaccident.HowevergloriousmightbehisfutureasJayGatsby,hewasatpresentapennilessyoungmanwithoutapast,andatanymomenttheinvisiblecloakofhisuniformmightslipfromhisshoulders.Sohemadethemostofhistime.Hetookwhathecouldget,ravenouslyandunscrupulously—eventuallyhetookDaisyonestillOctobernight,tookherbecausehehadnorealrighttotouchherhand. Hemighthavedespisedhimself,forhehadcertainlytakenherunderfalsepretences.Idon’tmeanthathehadtradedonhisphantommillions,buthehaddeliberatelygivenDaisyasenseofsecurityheletherbelievethathewasapersonfrommuchthesamestrataasherself—thathewasfullyabletotakecareofher.Asamatteroffact,hehadnosuchfacilities—hehadnocomfortablefamilystandingbehindhim,andhewasliableatthewhimofanimpersonalgovernmenttobeblownanywhereabouttheworld. Buthedidn’tdespisehimselfanditdidn’tturnoutashehadimagined.Hehadintended,probably,totakewhathecouldandgo—butnowhefoundthathehadcommittedhimselftothefollowingofagrail.HeknewthatDaisywasextraordinary,buthedidn’trealizejusthowextraordinarya“nice”girlcouldbe.Shevanishedintoherrichhouse,intoherrich,fulllife,leavingGatsby—nothing.Hefeltmarriedtoher,thatwasall. Whentheymetagain,twodayslater,itwasGatsbywhowasbreathless,whowas,somehow,betrayed.Herporchwasbrightwiththeboughtluxuryofstar-shinethewickerofthesetteesqueakedfashionablyassheturnedtowardhimandhekissedhercuriousandlovelymouth.Shehadcaughtacold,anditmadehervoicehuskierandmorecharmingthanever,andGatsbywasoverwhelminglyawareoftheyouthandmysterythatwealthimprisonsandpreserves,ofthefreshnessofmanyclothes,andofDaisy,gleaminglikesilver,safeandproudabovethehotstrugglesofthepoor. “Ican’tdescribetoyou