CHAPTER XXXV. WHEREIN MATTERS MAKE SOME PROGRESS, BUT NOT MUCH.

"ShedidnotspeakinthewayyoufancybutIaskedher,andIwouldmakehertellmewhatshethoughtofyou,orratherhowshefelttowardsyou.IwantedtoknowIhadlongwantedtoknow." "SohadIbutletushear.Shethinksmeanly,shefeelscontemptuously,doubtless?" "Shethinksofyoualmostashighlyasawomancanthinkofaman.Youknowshecanbeeloquent.Iyetfeelinfancytheglowofthelanguageinwhichheropinionwasconveyed." "Buthowdoesshefeel?" "Tillyoushockedher(shesaidyouhadshockedher,butshewouldnottellmehow)shefeltasasisterfeelstowardsabrotherofwhomsheisatoncefondandproud." "I'llshockhernomore,Cary,fortheshockreboundedonmyselftillIstaggeredagain.Butthatcomparisonaboutsisterandbrotherisallnonsense.Sheistoorichandproudtoentertainfraternalsentimentsforme." "Youdon'tknowher,Robertand,somehow,Ifancynow(Ihadotherideasformerly)thatyoucannotknowher.Youandshearenotsoconstructedastobeablethoroughlytounderstandeachother." "Itmaybeso.Iesteemher,Iadmireherandyetmyimpressionsconcerningherareharsh—perhapsuncharitable.Ibelieve,forinstance,thatsheisincapableoflove——" "Shirleyincapableoflove!" "Thatshewillnevermarry.Iimagineherjealousofcompromisingherpride,ofrelinquishingherpower,ofsharingherproperty." "Shirleyhashurtyouramourpropre." "ShedidhurtitthoughIhadnotanemotionoftenderness,norasparkofpassionforher." "Then,Robert,itwasverywickedinyoutowanttomarryher." "Andverymean,mylittlepastor,myprettypriestess.IneverwantedtokissMissKeeldarinmylife,thoughshehasfinelips,scarletandroundasripecherriesor,ifIdidwishit,itwasthemeredesireoftheeye." "Idoubt,now,whetheryouarespeakingthetruth.Thegrapesorthecherriesaresour—'hungtoohigh.'" "Shehasaprettyfigure,aprettyface,beautifulhair.Iacknowledgeallhercharmsandfeelnoneofthem,oronlyfeeltheminawayshewoulddisdain.IsupposeIwastrulytemptedbythemeregildingofthebait.Caroline,whatanoblefellowyourRobertis—great,good,disinterested,andthensopure!" "Butnotperfect.Hemadeagreatblunderonce,andwewillhearnomoreaboutit." "Andshallwethinknomoreaboutit,Cary?Shallwenotdespisehiminourheart—gentlebutjust,compassionatebutupright?" "Never!Wewillrememberthatwithwhatmeasurewemeteitshallbemeasureduntous,andsowewillgivenoscorn,onlyaffection." "Whichwon'tsatisfy,Iwarnyouofthat.Somethingbesidesaffection—somethingfarstronger,sweeter,warmer—willbedemandedoneday.Isittheretogive?" Carolinewasmoved,muchmoved. "Becalm,Lina,"saidMooresoothingly."Ihavenointention,becauseIhavenoright,toperturbyourmindnow,norformonthstocome.Don'tlookasifyouwouldleaveme.Wewillmakenomoreagitatingallusionswewillresumeourgossip.Donottremblelookmeintheface.Seewhatapoor,pale,grimphantomIam—morepitiablethanformidable." Shelookedshyly."Thereissomethingformidablestill,paleasyouare,"shesaid,ashereyefellunderhis. "ToreturntoShirley,"pursuedMoore:"isityouropinionthatsheiseverlikelytomarry?" "Sheloves." "Platonically—theoretically—allhumbug!" "SheloveswhatIcallsincerely." "Didshesayso?" "Icannotaffirmthatshesaidso.Nosuchconfessionas'Ilovethismanorthat'passedherlips." "Ithoughtnot." "Butthefeelingmadeitswayinspiteofher,andIsawit.Shespokeofonemaninastrainnottobemisunderstood.Hervoicealonewassufficienttestimony.Havingwrungfromheranopiniononyourcharacter,Idemandedasecondopinionof—anotherpersonaboutwhomIhadmyconjectures,thoughtheywerethemosttangledandpuzzledconjecturesintheworld.Iwouldmakeherspeak.Ishookher,Ichidher,Ipinchedherfingerswhenshetriedtoputmeoffwithgibesandjestsinherqueerprovokingway,andatlastoutitcame.Thevoice,Isay,wasenoughhardlyraisedaboveawhisper,andyetsuchasoftvehemenceinitstones.Therewasnoconfession,noconfidence,inthematter.TothesethingsshecannotcondescendbutIamsurethatman'shappinessisdeartoherasherownlife." "Whoisit?" "Ichargedherwiththefact.Shedidnotdeny,shedidnotavow,butlookedatme.Isawhereyesbythesnow-gleam.Itwasquiteenough.Itriumphedoverhermercilessly." "Whatrighthadyoutotriumph?Doyoumeantosayyouarefancyfree?" "WhateverIam,Shirleyisabondswoman.Lioness,shehasfoundhercaptor.Mistressshemaybeofallroundher,butherownmistresssheisnot." "Soyouexultedatrecognizingafellow-slaveinonesofairandimperial?" "IdidRobert,yousayright,inonesofairandimperial." "Youconfessit—afellow-slav