CHAPTER XXVIII

“Goodness,Denham,whatareyoudoinghere?”heexclaimed,recognizinghim. Ralphmumbledsomethingaboutbeingonhiswayhome.Theywalkedontogether,thoughRodneywalkedquickenoughtomakeitplainthathehadnowishforcompany. Hewasveryunhappy.ThatafternoonCassandrahadrepulsedhimhehadtriedtoexplaintoherthedifficultiesofthesituation,andtosuggestthenatureofhisfeelingsforherwithoutsayinganythingdefiniteoranythingoffensivetoher.ButhehadlosthisheadunderthegoadofKatharine’sridiculehehadsaidtoomuch,andCassandra,superbinherdignityandseverity,hadrefusedtohearanotherword,andthreatenedanimmediatereturntoherhome.Hisagitation,afteraneveningspentbetweenthetwowomen,wasextreme.Moreover,hecouldnothelpsuspectingthatRalphwaswanderingneartheHilberys’house,atthishour,forreasonsconnectedwithKatharine.Therewasprobablysomeunderstandingbetweenthem—notthatanythingofthekindmatteredtohimnow.HewasconvincedthathehadnevercaredforanyonesaveCassandra,andKatharine’sfuturewasnoconcernofhis.Aloud,hesaid,shortly,thathewasverytiredandwishedtofindacab.ButonSundaynight,ontheEmbankment,cabswerehardtocomeby,andRodneyfoundhimselfconstrainedtowalksomedistance,atanyrate,inDenham’scompany.Denhammaintainedhissilence.Rodney’sirritationlapsed.Hefoundthesilenceoddlysuggestiveofthegoodmasculinequalitieswhichhemuchrespected,andhadatthismomentgreatreasontoneed.Afterthemystery,difficulty,anduncertaintyofdealingwiththeothersex,intercoursewithone’sownisapttohaveacomposingandevenennoblinginfluence,sinceplainspeakingispossibleandsubterfugesofnoavail.Rodney,too,wasmuchinneedofaconfidantKatharine,despiteherpromisesofhelp,hadfailedhimatthecriticalmomentshehadgoneoffwithDenhamshewas,perhaps,tormentingDenhamasshehadtormentedhim.Howgraveandstableheseemed,speakinglittle,andwalkingfirmly,comparedwithwhatRodneyknewofhisowntormentsandindecisions!HebegantocastaboutforsomewayoftellingthestoryofhisrelationswithKatharineandCassandrathatwouldnotlowerhiminDenham’seyes.Itthenoccurredtohimthat,perhaps,KatharineherselfhadconfidedinDenhamtheyhadsomethingincommonitwaslikelythattheyhaddiscussedhimthatveryafternoon.Thedesiretodiscoverwhattheyhadsaidofhimnowcameuppermostinhismind.HerecalledKatharine’slaughherememberedthatshehadgone,laughing,towalkwithDenham. “Didyoustaylongafterwe’dleft?”heaskedabruptly. “No.Wewentbacktomyhouse.” ThisseemedtoconfirmRodney’sbeliefthathehadbeendiscussed.Heturnedovertheunpalatableideaforawhile,insilence. “Womenareincomprehensiblecreatures,Denham!”hethenexclaimed. “Um,”saidDenham,whoseemedtohimselfpossessedofcompleteunderstanding,notmerelyofwomen,butoftheentireuniverse.HecouldreadRodney,too,likeabook.Heknewthathewasunhappy,andhepitiedhim,andwishedtohelphim. “Yousaysomethingandthey—flyintoapassion.Orfornoreasonatall,theylaugh.Itakeitthatnoamountofeducationwill—”Theremainderofthesentencewaslostinthehighwind,againstwhichtheyhadtostrugglebutDenhamunderstoodthathereferredtoKatharine’slaughter,andthatthememoryofitwasstillhurtinghim.IncomparisonwithRodney,DenhamfelthimselfverysecurehesawRodneyasoneofthelostbirdsdashedsenselessagainsttheglassoneoftheflyingbodiesofwhichtheairwasfull.ButheandKatharinewerealonetogether,aloft,splendid,andluminouswithatwofoldradiance.Hepitiedtheunstablecreaturebesidehimhefeltadesiretoprotecthim,exposedwithouttheknowledgewhichmadehisownwaysodirect.Theywereunitedastheadventurousareunited,thoughonereachesthegoalandtheotherperishesbytheway. “Youcouldn’tlaughatsomeoneyoucaredfor.” Thissentence,apparentlyaddressedtonootherhumanbeing,reachedDenham’sears.Thewindseemedtomuffleitandflyawaywithitdirectly.HadRodneyspokenthosewords? “Youloveher.”Wasthathisownvoice,whichseemedtosoundintheairseveralyardsinfrontofhim? “I’vesufferedtortures,Denham,tortures!” “Yes,yes,Iknowthat.” “She’slaughedatme.” “Never—tome.” Thewindblewaspacebetweenthewords—blewthemsofarawaythattheyseemedunspoken. “HowI’velovedher!” ThiswascertainlyspokenbythemanatDenham’sside.ThevoicehadallthemarksofRodney’scharacter,andrecalled,withstrangevividness,hispersonalappearance.Denhamcouldseehimagainsttheblankbuildingsandtowersofthehorizon.Hesawhimdignified,exalted,andtragic,ashemighthaveappearedthinkingofKatharinealoneinhisroomsatnight. “IaminlovewithKatharinemyself.ThatiswhyIamhereto-night.” Ralphspokedistinctlyanddeliberately,asifRodney’sconfessionhadmadethisstatementnecessary. Rodneyexclaimedsomethinginarticulate. “Ah,I’vealwaysknownit,”hecried,“I’veknownitfromthefirst.You’llmarryher!” Thecryhadanoteofdespairinit.Againthewindinterceptedtheirwords.Theysaidnomore.Atlengththeydrewupbeneathalamp-post,simultaneously. “MyGod,Denham,whatfoolswebothare!”Rodneyexclaimed.Theylookedateachother,queerly,inthelightofthelamp.Fools!Theyseemedtoconfesstoeachothertheextremedepthsoftheirfolly.Forthemoment,underthelamp-post,theyseemedtobeawareofsomecommonknowledgewhichdidawaywiththepossibilityofrivalry,andmadethemfeelmoresympathyforeachotherthanforanyoneelseintheworld.Givingsimultaneouslyalittlenod,asifinconfirmationofthisunderstanding,theypartedwithoutspeakingagain.