CHAPTER XXI
關燈
小
中
大
“We’lljustsithere,”saidBarney,“andifwethinkofanythingworthwhilesayingwe’llsayit.Otherwise,not.Don’timagineyou’reboundtotalktome.”
“JohnFostersays,”quotedValancy,“‘Ifyoucansitinsilencewithapersonforhalfanhourandyetbeentirelycomfortable,youandthatpersoncanbefriends.Ifyoucannot,friendsyou’llneverbeandyouneednotwastetimeintrying.’”
“EvidentlyJohnFostersaysasensiblethingonceinawhile,”concededBarney.
Theysatinsilenceforalongwhile.Littlerabbitshoppedacrosstheroad.Onceortwiceanowllaughedoutdelightfully.Theroadbeyondthemwasfringedwiththewovenshadowlaceoftrees.AwayofftothesouthwesttheskywasfullofsilverylittlecirruscloudsabovethespotwhereBarney’sislandmustbe.
Valancywasperfectlyhappy.Somethingsdawnonyouslowly.Somethingscomebylightningflashes.Valancyhadhadalightningflash.
SheknewquitewellnowthatshelovedBarney.Yesterdayshehadbeenallherown.Nowshewasthisman’s.Yethehaddonenothing—saidnothing.Hehadnotevenlookedatherasawoman.Butthatdidn’tmatter.Nordiditmatterwhathewasorwhathehaddone.Shelovedhimwithoutanyreservations.Everythinginherwentoutwhollytohim.Shehadnowishtostifleordisownherlove.Sheseemedtobehissoabsolutelythatthoughtapartfromhim—thoughtinwhichhedidnotpredominate—wasanimpossibility.
Shehadrealised,quitesimplyandfully,thatshelovedhim,inthemomentwhenhewasleaningonthecardoor,explainingthatLadyJanehadnogas.Shehadlookeddeepintohiseyesinthemoonlightandhadknown.Injustthatinfinitesimalspaceoftimeeverythingwaschanged.Oldthingspassedawayandallthingsbecamenew.
Shewasnolongerunimportant,little,oldmaidValancyStirling.Shewasawoman,fullofloveandthereforerichandsignificant—justifiedtoherself.Lifewasnolongeremptyandfutile,anddeathcouldcheatherofnothing.Lovehadcastoutherlastfear.
Love!Whatasearing,torturing,intolerablysweetthingitwas—thispossessionofbody,soulandmind!Withsomethingatitscoreasfineandremoteandpurelyspiritualasthetinybluesparkintheheartoftheunbreakablediamond.Nodreamhadeverbeenlikethis.Shewasnolongersolitary.Shewasoneofavastsisterhood—allthewomenwh
