CHAPTER II "Try Your Luck with Professor Challenger"

IalwayslikedMcArdle,thecrabbed,old,round-backed,red-headednewseditor,andIratherhopedthathelikedme.Ofcourse,BeaumontwastherealbossbuthelivedintherarefiedatmosphereofsomeOlympianheightfromwhichhecoulddistinguishnothingsmallerthananinternationalcrisisorasplitintheCabinet.Sometimeswesawhimpassinginlonelymajestytohisinnersanctum,withhiseyesstaringvaguelyandhismindhoveringovertheBalkansorthePersianGulf.Hewasaboveandbeyondus.ButMcArdlewashisfirstlieutenant,anditwashethatweknew.TheoldmannoddedasIenteredtheroom,andhepushedhisspectaclesfaruponhisbaldforehead. "Well,Mr.Malone,fromallIhear,youseemtobedoingverywell,"saidheinhiskindlyScotchaccent. Ithankedhim. "Thecollieryexplosionwasexcellent.SowastheSouthwarkfire.Youhavethetruedescreeptivetouch.Whatdidyouwanttoseemeabout?" "Toaskafavor." Helookedalarmed,andhiseyesshunnedmine."Tut,tut!Whatisit?" "Doyouthink,Sir,thatyoucouldpossiblysendmeonsomemissionforthepaper?Iwoulddomybesttoputitthroughandgetyousomegoodcopy." "Whatsortofmeesionhadyouinyourmind,Mr.Malone?" "Well,Sir,anythingthathadadventureanddangerinit.Ireallywoulddomyverybest.Themoredifficultitwas,thebetteritwouldsuitme." "Youseemveryanxioustoloseyourlife." "Tojustifymylife,Sir." "Dearme,Mr.Malone,thisisvery—veryexalted.I'mafraidthedayforthissortofthingisratherpast.Theexpenseofthe'specialmeesion'businesshardlyjustifiestheresult,and,ofcourse,inanycaseitwouldonlybeanexperiencedmanwithanamethatwouldcommandpublicconfidencewhowouldgetsuchanorder.Thebigblankspacesinthemapareallbeingfilledin,andthere'snoroomforromanceanywhere.Waitabit,though!"headded,withasuddensmileuponhisface."Talkingoftheblankspacesofthemapgivesmeanidea.Whataboutexposingafraud—amodernMunchausen—andmakinghimrideeculous?Youcouldshowhimupastheliarthatheis!Eh,man,itwouldbefine.Howdoesitappealtoyou?" "Anything—anywhere—Icarenothing." McArdlewasplungedinthoughtforsomeminutes. "Iwonderwhetheryoucouldgetonfriendly—oratleastontalkingtermswiththefellow,"hesaid,atlast."Youseemtohaveasortofgeniusforestablishingrelationswithpeople—seempathy,Isuppose,oranimalmagnetism,oryouthfulvitality,orsomething.Iamconsciousofitmyself." "Youareverygood,sir." "SowhyshouldyounottryyourluckwithProfessorChallenger,ofEnmorePar