CHAPTER VII.

toberead?Wasthislikewishingtoavoidher?Andthenextmomentshewashatingherselfforthefollywhichaskedthequestion. Ononeotherquestionwhichperhapsherutmostwisdommightnothaveprevented,shewassoonsparedallsuspensefor,aftertheMissMusgroveshadreturnedandfinishedtheirvisitattheCottageshehadthisspontaneousinformationfromMary:— “CaptainWentworthisnotverygallantbyyou,Anne,thoughhewassoattentivetome.Henriettaaskedhimwhathethoughtofyou,whentheywentaway,andhesaid,‘Youweresoalteredheshouldnothaveknownyouagain.’” Maryhadnofeelingstomakeherrespecthersister’sinacommonway,butshewasperfectlyunsuspiciousofbeinginflictinganypeculiarwound. “Alteredbeyondhisknowledge.”Annefullysubmitted,insilent,deepmortification.Doubtlessitwasso,andshecouldtakenorevenge,forhewasnotaltered,ornotfortheworse.Shehadalreadyacknowledgedittoherself,andshecouldnotthinkdifferently,lethimthinkofherashewould.No:theyearswhichhaddestroyedheryouthandbloomhadonlygivenhimamoreglowing,manly,openlook,innorespectlesseninghispersonaladvantages.ShehadseenthesameFrederickWentworth. “Soalteredthatheshouldnothaveknownheragain!”Thesewerewordswhichcouldnotbutdwellwithher.Yetshesoonbegantorejoicethatshehadheardthem.Theywereofsoberingtendencytheyallayedagitationtheycomposed,andconsequentlymustmakeherhappier. FrederickWentworthhadusedsuchwords,orsomethinglikethem,butwithoutanideathattheywouldbecarriedroundtoher.Hehadthoughtherwretchedlyaltered,andinthefirstmomentofappeal,hadspokenashefelt.HehadnotforgivenAnneElliot.Shehadusedhimill,desertedanddisappointedhimandworse,shehadshewnafeeblenessofcharacterindoingso,whichhisowndecided,confidenttempercouldnotendure.Shehadgivenhimuptoobligeothers.Ithadbeentheeffectofover-persuasion.Ithadbeenweaknessandtimidity. Hehadbeenmostwarmlyattachedtoher,andhadneverseenawomansincewhomhethoughtherequalbut,exceptfromsomenaturalsensationofcuriosity,hehadnodesireofmeetingheragain.Herpowerwithhimwasgoneforever. Itwasnowhisobjecttomarry.Hewasrich,andbeingturnedonshore,fullyintendedtosettleassoonashecouldbeproperlytemptedactuallylookinground,readytofallinlovewithallthespeedwhichaclearheadandaquicktastecouldallow.HehadaheartforeitheroftheMissMusgroves,iftheycouldcatchitaheart,inshort,foranypleasingyoungwomanwhocameinhisway,exceptingAnneElliot.Thiswashisonlysecretexception,whenhesaidtohissister,inanswertohersuppositions:— “Yes,hereIam,Sophia,quitereadytomakeafoolishmatch.Anybodybetweenfifteenandthirtymayhavemeforasking.Alittlebeauty,andafewsmiles,andafewcomplimentstothenavy,andIamalostman.Shouldnotthisbeenoughforasailor,whohashadnosocietyamongwomentomakehimnice?” Hesaidit,sheknew,tobecontradicted.HisbrightproudeyespoketheconvictionthathewasniceandAnneElliotwasnotoutofhisthoughts,whenhemoreseriouslydescribedthewomanheshouldwishtomeetwith.“Astrongmind,withsweetnessofmanner,”madethefirstandthelastofthedescription. “ThatisthewomanIwant,”saidhe.“SomethingalittleinferiorIshallofcourseputupwith,butitmustnotbemuch.IfIamafool,Ishallbeafoolindeed,forIhavethoughtonthesubjectmorethanmostmen.”