Chapter XXX

efersblackbeetlesandstuffedkangaroos.” “Youshouldn’tdrawsuchrapidconclusions,myfriend.” “D’youthinkshe’sfondofhim?” “MydearGerald,whataquestion!Isitnotherdutytolove,honour,andobeyhim?” “IfIwereawomanIcouldneverhonouramanwhowasbald.” “Hislocksaresomewhatscantybuthehasastrongsenseofduty.” “Iknowthat,”shoutedGerald.“Itoozesoutofhimwheneverhegetshot,justlikegum.” “He’saCountyCouncillor,andhemakesspeechesabouttheUnionJack,andhe’svirtuous.” “Iknowthattoo.Hesimplyreeksofthetencommandments:theystickoutalloverhim,likealmondsinatipsycake.” “MydearGerald,EdwardisamodelheisthetypicalEnglishmanasheflourishesinthecountry,uprightandhonest,healthy,dogmatic,moral—ratherstupid.Iesteemhimenormously,andIoughttolikehimmuchbetterthanyou,whoareadisgracefulscamp.” “Iwonderwhyyoudon’t.” “BecauseI’mawickedoldwomanandI’velearntbylongexperiencethatpeoplegenerallykeeptheirvicestothemselves,butinsistonthrowingtheirvirtuesinyourface.Andifyoudon’thappentohaveanyofyourown,yougettheworstoftheencounter.” “Ithinkthat’swhatissocomfortableinyou,AuntPolly,thatyou’renotobstreperouslygood.You’recharityitself.” “MydearGerald,”saidMissLey,puttingupanadmonishingforefinger,“womenarebynaturespitefulandintolerantwhenyoufindonewhoexercisescharity,itprovesthatshewantsitverybadlyherself.” MissLeywasgladthatEdwardcouldnotstaymorethantwodays,forshewasalwaysafraidofsurprisinghim.NothingismoretediousthantotalkwithpersonswhotreatyourmostobviousremarksasstartlingparadoxesandEdwardsufferedlikewisefromthatpassionforargument,whichisthebadtalker’ssubstituteforconversation.Peoplewhocannottalkarealwaysproudoftheirdialectic:theywanttomodifyyourtritestobservations,andevenifyousuggestthatthedayisfineinsistonarguingitout. Bertha,inherhusband’spresence,hadsufferedsingulardiscomfortithadbeensuchaconstraintthatshefounditanefforttotalkwithhim,andshehadtorackherbrainforsubjectsofconversation.HerheartwasperceptiblylightenedwhenshereturnedfromVictoriaafterseeinghimoff,anditgaveherathrillofpleasuretohearGeraldjumpupwhenshecamein.Herantowardsherwithglowingeyes. “Oh,I’msoglad.I’vehardlyhadachanceofspeakingtoyoutheselasttwodays.” “Wehavethewholeafternoonbeforeus.” “Let’sgoforawalk,shallwe?” Berthaagreed,andliketwoschoolfellowstheysalliedout.Thedaywassunnyandwarm,andtheywanderedbytheriver.ThebanksoftheThamesaboutChelseahaveapleasingtrimness,alevitywhichisinfinitelygratefulafterthesedatenessoftherestofLondon.Theembankments,inspiteoftheirnovel