Chapter IX

nerjustmissedbeingeatable.Mrs.Brandertonwasawomanoffashionanddisdainedthesolidfareofacountrydinner-party—thicksoup,friedsoles,muttoncutlets,roastmutton,pheasant,Charlotterusse,andjellies.(Theearlierdishesarevariableaccordingtoseason,buttheCharlotterusseandthejellyareinevitable.)No,Mrs.Brandertonsaidshemustbealittlemore“distangay”thanthat,andprovidedherguestswithclearsoup,entreesfromtheStores,afluffysweetwhichlookedprettyandtastedhorrid.Thefeastwasextremelyelegant,butitwasnotfilling,whichisunpleasanttoelderlysquireswithlargeappetites. “InevergetenoughtoeatattheBrandertons,”saidMr.AtthillBacot,indignantly. “Well,Iknowtheoldwoman,”repliedMr.Molson.Mrs.Brandertonwasthesameageashimself,buthewasratheradog,andthoughthimselfquiteyoungenoughtoflirtwiththeleastplainofthetwoMissHancocks.“Iknowherwell,andImakeapointofdrinkingaglassofsherrywithacoupleofeggsbeatenupinitbeforeIcome.” “Thewinesarepositivelyimmoral,”saidMrs.MaystonRyle,whopridedherselfonherpalate.“I’malwaysinclinedtobringwithmeaflaskwithalittlegoodwhiskyinit.” Butifthefoodwasnotheavytheconversationwas.Itisanaxiomofnarrationthattruthshouldcoincidewithprobability,andtherealistisperpetuallyhamperedbythewildexaggerationofactualfactsaverbatimreportoftheconversationatMrs.Branderton’sdinner-partywouldreadlikeashriekingcaricature.Theanecdotereignedsupreme.Mrs.MaystonRylewasaspecialistintheclericalanecdoteshesuccessivelyrelatedthestoryofBishopThoroldandhiswhitehands,thestoryofBishopWilberforceandthebloodyshovel.(Thissomewhatshockedtheladies,butMrs.MaystonRylecouldnotspoilherpointbytheomissionofaswearword.)TheDeangaveananecdoteabouthimself,towhichMrs.MaystonRyleretortedwithoneabouttheArchbishopofCanterburyandthetediouscurate.Mr.ArthillBacotgavepoliticalanecdotes,Mr.GladstoneandthetableoftheHouseofCommons,Dizzyandtheagriculturallabourer.TheclimaxcamewhenGeneralHancockgavehiscelebratedstoriesabouttheDukeofWellington.Edwardlaughedheartilyatthemall. Bertha’seyeswereconstantlyuponherhusband.Shedetestedthethoughtsthatranthroughherhead,forthattheyshouldcometoheratallwasdisparagingtohimbutstillshewashorriblyanxious.Washenotperfect,andhandsome,andadorable?Whyshouldshetremblebeforetheopinionofadozenstupidpeople?Butshecouldnothelpit.Howevermuchshedespisedherneighbours,shecouldnotpreventherselffrombeingmiserablyaffectedbytheirjudgment.AndwhatdidEdwardfeel?Washeasnervousasshe?Shecouldnotbearthethoughtthatheshouldsufferpain.ItwasanimmensereliefwhenMrs.Brandertonrosefromthetable.BerthalookedatArthurholdingopenthedoorshewouldhavegivenanythingtoaskhimtolookafterEdward,butdarednot.Shewasterrifiedlest,tohishumiliation,thoseoldsquiresshouldpointedlyignorehim. Onreachingthedrawing-roomMissGloverfoundherselfbyBertha’sside,alittleseparat