CHAPTER IV. MISS MARCHMONT.

ssing,strangelydark,thelawn.HowcouldInamethatthinginthemoonlightbeforeme?orhowcouldIutterthefeelingwhichroseinmysoul? “Icouldonlyrunout.Agreatanimal—truly,Frank’sblackhorse—stoodtrembling,panting,snortingbeforethedooramanheldit,Frank,asIthought. “‘Whatisthematter?’Idemanded.Thomas,myownservant,answeredbysayingsharply,‘Gointothehouse,madam.’Andthencallingtoanotherservant,whocamehurryingfromthekitchenasifsummonedbysomeinstinct,‘Ruth,takemissisintothehousedirectly.’ButIwaskneelingdowninthesnow,besidesomethingthatlaythere—somethingthatIhadseendraggedalongtheground—somethingthatsighed,thatgroanedonmybreast,asIliftedanddrewittome.Hewasnotdeadhewasnotquiteunconscious.IhadhimcarriedinIrefusedtobeorderedaboutandthrustfromhim.Iwasquitecollectedenough,notonlytobemyownmistressbutthemistressofothers.Theyhadbegunbytryingtotreatmelikeachild,astheyalwaysdowithpeoplestruckbyGod’shandbutIgaveplacetononeexceptthesurgeonandwhenhehaddonewhathecould,ItookmydyingFranktomyself.HehadstrengthtofoldmeinhisarmshehadpowertospeakmynameheheardmeasIprayedoverhimverysoftlyhefeltmeasItenderlyandfondlycomfortedhim. “‘Maria,’hesaid,‘IamdyinginParadise.’Hespenthislastbreathinfaithfulwordsforme.WhenthedawnofChristmasmorningbroke,myFrankwaswithGod. “Andthat,”shewenton,“happenedthirtyyearsago.Ihavesufferedsince.IdoubtifIhavemadethebestuseofallmycalamities.Soft,amiablenaturestheywouldhaverefinedtosaintlinessofstrong,evilspiritstheywouldhavemadedemonsasforme,Ihaveonlybeenawoe-struckandselfishwoman.” “Youhavedonemuchgood,”Isaidforshewasnotedforherliberalalmsgiving. “Ihavenotwithheldmoney,youmean,whereitcouldassuageaffliction.Whatofthat?Itcostmenoeffortorpangtogive.ButIthinkfromthisdayIamabouttoenterabetterframeofmind,topreparemyselfforreunionwithFrank.YouseeIstillthinkofFrankmorethanofGodandunlessitbecountedthatinthuslovingthecreaturesomuch,solong,andsoexclusively,IhavenotatleastblasphemedtheCreator,smallismychanceofsalvation.Whatdoyouthink,Lucy,ofthesethings?Bemychaplain,andtellme.” ThisquestionIcouldnotanswer:Ihadnowords.ItseemedasifshethoughtIhadansweredit. “Veryright,mychild.WeshouldacknowledgeGodmerciful,butnotalwaysforuscomprehensible.Weshouldacceptourownlot,whateveritbe,andtrytorenderhappythatofothers.Shouldwenot?Well,to-morrowIwillbeginbytryingtomakeyouhappy.Iwillendeavourtodosomethingforyou,Lucy:somethingthatwillbenefityouwhenIamdead.MyheadachesnowwithtalkingtoomuchstillIamhappy.Gotobed.Theclockstrikestwo.HowlateyousituporratherhowlateI,inmyselfishness,keepyouup.ButgonowhavenomoreanxietyformeIfeelIshallrestwell.” Shecomposedherselfasiftoslumber.I,too,retiredtomycribinaclosetwithinherroom.Thenightpassedinquietnessquietlyherdoommustatlasthavecome:peacefullyandpainlessly:inthemorningshewasfoundwithoutlife,nearlycold,butallcalmandundisturbed.Herpreviousexcitementofspiritsandchangeofmoodhadbeenthepreludeofafitonestrokesufficedtoseverthethreadofanexistencesolongfrettedbyaffliction.