CHAPTER XI
關燈
小
中
大
“Itwill,indeed,aftersuchanabsenceanabsencenotonlylong,butincludingsomanydangers.”
“Itwillbetheforerunneralsoofotherinterestingevents:yoursister’smarriage,andyourtakingorders.”
“Yes.”
“Don’tbeaffronted,”saidshe,laughing,“butitdoesputmeinmindofsomeoftheoldheathenheroes,who,afterperforminggreatexploitsinaforeignland,offeredsacrificestothegodsontheirsafereturn.”
“Thereisnosacrificeinthecase,”repliedEdmund,withaserioussmile,andglancingatthepianoforteagain“itisentirelyherowndoing.”
“OhyesIknowitis.Iwasmerelyjoking.ShehasdonenomorethanwhateveryyoungwomanwoulddoandIhavenodoubtofherbeingextremelyhappy.Myothersacrifice,ofcourse,youdonotunderstand.”
“Mytakingorders,Iassureyou,isquiteasvoluntaryasMaria’smarrying.”
“Itisfortunatethatyourinclinationandyourfather’sconvenienceshouldaccordsowell.Thereisaverygoodlivingkeptforyou,Iunderstand,hereabouts.”
“Whichyousupposehasbiassedme?”
“ButthatIamsureithasnot,”criedFanny.
“Thankyouforyourgoodword,Fanny,butitismorethanIwouldaffirmmyself.Onthecontrary,theknowingthattherewassuchaprovisionformeprobablydidbiasme.NorcanIthinkitwrongthatitshould.Therewasnonaturaldisinclinationtobeovercome,andIseenoreasonwhyamanshouldmakeaworseclergymanforknowingthathewillhaveacompetenceearlyinlife.Iwasinsafehands.IhopeIshouldnothavebeeninfluencedmyselfinawrongway,andIamsuremyfatherwastooconscientioustohaveallowedit.IhavenodoubtthatIwasbiased,butIthinkitwasblamelessly.”
“Itisthesamesortofthing,”saidFanny,afterashortpause,“asforthesonofanadmiraltogointothenavy,orthesonofageneraltobeinthearmy,andnobodyseesanythingwronginthat.Nobodywondersthattheyshouldpreferthelinewheretheirfriendscanservethembest,orsuspectsthemtobelessinearnestinitthantheyappear.”
“No,mydearMissPrice,andforreasonsgood.Theprofession,eithernavyorarmy,isitsownjustification.Ithaseverythinginitsfavour:heroism,danger,bustle,fashion.Soldiersandsailorsarealwaysacceptableinsociety.Nobodycanwonderthatmenaresoldiersandsailors.”
“Butthemotivesofamanwhotakesorderswiththecertaintyofprefermentmaybefairlysuspected,youthink?”saidEdmund.“Tobejustifiedinyoureyes,hemustdoitinthemostcompleteuncertaintyofanyprovision.”
“What!takeorderswithoutaliving!Nothatismadnessindeedabsolutemadness
