CHAPTER XVII. PLAYING GRANDMOTHER

pagain,andsteadierthanever.Justyoureadthat,andtellmewhatyouthinkofit.” Tomsnatchedaletteroffthetable,putitintoherhands,andbegantowalkupanddownthelittleroom,likeaveritablebearinitscage.AsPollyreadthatshortnote,allthecolorwentoutofherface,andhereyesbegantokindle.Whenshecametotheend,shestoodaminute,asiftooindignanttospeak,thengavethepaperanervoussortofcrumpleanddroppeditonthefloor,saying,allinonebreath,“Ithinksheisamercenary,heartless,ungratefulgirl!That'swhatIthink.” “Oh,thedeuce!Ididn'tmeantoshowthatoneit'stheother.”AndTomtookupasecondpaper,lookinghalfangry,halfashamedathisownmistake.“Idon'tcare,thougheveryonewillknowto-morrowandperhapsyou'llbegoodenoughtokeepthegirlsfrombotheringmewithquestionsandgabble,”headded,asif,onsecondthoughts,hewasrelievedtohavethecommunicationmadetoPollyfirst. “Idon'twonderyoulookedupset.Iftheotherletterisasbad,I'dbetterhaveachairbeforeIreadit,”saidPolly,feelingthatshebegantotremblewithexcitement. “It'samilliontimesbetter,butitknockedmeworsethantheotherkindnessalwaysdoes.”Tomstoppedshortthere,andstoodaminuteturningtheletteraboutinhishandasifitcontainedasweetwhichneutralizedthebitterinthatsmallernote,andtouchedhimverymuch.Thenhedrewupanarm-chair,andbeckoningPollytotakeit,saidinasober,steadytone,thatsurprisedhergreatly,“WheneverIwasinaquandary,Iusedtogoandconsultgrandma,andshealwayshadsomethingsensibleorcomfortabletosaytome.She'sgonenow,butsomehow,Polly,youseemtotakeherplace.Wouldyoumindsittinginherchair,andlettingmetellyoutwoorthreethings,asWilldoes?” Mindit?PollyfeltthatTomhadpaidherthehighestandmostbeautifulcomplimenthecouldhavedevised.Shehadoftenlongedtodoit,for,beingbroughtupinthemostaffectionateandfrankrelationswithherbrothers,shehadearlylearnedwhatittakesmostwomensometimetodiscover,thatsexdoesnotmakenearlyasmuchdifferenceinheartsandsoulsaswefancy.Joyandsorrow,loveandfear,lifeanddeathbringsomanyofthesameneedstoall,thatthewonderiswedonotunderstandeachotherbetter,butwaittilltimesoftribulationteachusthathumannatureisverymuchthesameinmenandwomen.Thankstothisknowledge,PollyunderstoodTominawaythatsurprisedandwonhim.Sheknewthathewantedwomanlysympathy,andthatshecouldgiveittohim,becauseshewasnotafraidtostretchherhandacrossthebarrierwhichourartificialeducationputsbetweenboysandgirls,andtosaytohiminallgoodfaith,“IfIcanhelpyou,letme.” TenminutessoonerPollycouldhavedonethisalmostaseasilytoTomastoWill,butinthattenminutessomethinghadhappenedwhichmadethisdifficult.ReadingthatTrixhadgivenTombackhisfreedomchangedmanythingstoPolly,andcausedhertoshrinkfromhisconfidence,becauseshefeltasifitwouldbehardernowtokeepselfoutofsightfor,spiteofmaidenmodesty,loveandhopewouldwakeandsingatthegoodnews.Slowlyshesatdown,andhesitatinglyshesaid,withhereyesontheground,andaveryhumblevoice,“I'lldomybest,butIcan'tfillgrandma'splace,orgiveyouanywise,goodadvice.IwishIcould!” “You'lldoitbetterthananyoneelse.Talktroublesmother,fatherhasenoughtothinkofwithoutanyofmyworries.Fanisagoodsoul,butsheisn'tpractical,andwealwaysgetintoasnarlifwetrytoworktogether,sowhohaveIbutmyothersister,Polly?Thepleasurethatletterwillgiveyoumaymakeupformyboringyou.” Ashespoke,Tomlaidtheotherpaperinherlap,andwentofftothewindow,asiftoleaveherfreetoenjoyitunseenbuthecouldnothelpaglancenowandthen,andasPolly'sfacebrightened,hisownfell. “Oh,Tom,that'sabirthdaypresentworthhaving,forit'ssobeautifullygivenIdon'tseehowyoucanrefuseit.ArthurSydneyisarealnobleman!”criedPolly,lookingupatlast,withherfactglowing,andhereyesfullofdelight. “Soheis!Idon'tknowanothermanliving,exceptfather,whowouldhavedonesuchathing,orwhoIcouldbringmyselftotakeitfrom.Doyousee,he'snotonlypaidtheconfoundeddebts,buthasdoneitinmyname,tosparemeallhecould?” “Isee,it'slikehimandIthinkhemustbeveryhappytobeabletodosuchathing.” “Itisanimmenseweightoffmyshoulders,forsomeofthosemencouldn'taffordtowaittillI'dbegged,borrowed,orearnedthemoney.Sydneycanwait,buthewon'tlong,ifIknowmyself.”“Youwon'ttakeitasagift,then?” “Wouldyou?” “No.” “Thendon'tthinkIwill.I'maprettypooraffair,Polly,butI'mnotmeanenoughtodothat,whileI'vegotaconscienceandapairofhands.” Aroughspeech,butitpleasedPollybetterthanthesmoothestTomhadevermadeinherhearing,forsomethinginhisfaceandvoicetoldherthatthefriendlyacthadrousedanoblersentimentthangratitude,makingthecancelledobligationsoftheboy,debtsofhonortotheman. “Whatwillyoudo,Tom?” “I'lltellyoumayIsithere?”AndTomtookthelowfootstoolthatalwaysstoodneargrandma'soldchair.“I'vehadsomanyplansinmyheadlately,thatsometimesitseemsasifitwouldsplit,”continuedthepoorfellow,rubbinghistiredforehead,asiftopolishuphiswits.“I'vethoughtseriouslyofgoingtoCalifornia,Australia,orsomeout-of-the-wayplace,wheremengetrichinahurry.” “Oh,no!”criedPolly,puttingoutherhandasittokeephim,andthensnatchingitbackagainbeforehecouldturnround. “Itwouldbehardonmotherandthegirls,Isupposebesides,Idon'tquitelikeitmyselflooksasifIshirkedandranaway.” “Soitdoes,”saidPolly,decidedly. “Well,youseeIdon'tseemtofindanythingtodounlessIturnclerk,andIdon'tthinkthatwouldsuit.Thefactis,Icouldn'tstandithere,whereI'mknown.Itwouldbeeasiertoscratchgravelonarailroad,withagangofPaddies,thantosellpinstomyfriendsandneighbors.Falsepride,Idaresay,butit'sthetruth,andthere'snouseindodging.” “Notabit,andIquiteagreewithyou.” “That'scomfortable.NowI'mcomingtothepointwhereIspeciallywantyouradvice,Polly.YesterdayIheardyoutellingFanaboutyourbrotherNedhowwellhegotonhowhelikedhisbusiness,andwantedWilltocomeandtakesomeplacenearhim.YouthoughtIwasreading,butIheardanditstruckmethatperhapsIcouldgetachanceoutWestsomewhere.Whatdoyouthink?” “Ifyour