CHAPTER XXV

todo,adiscussionofsubjectsnotremotelyconnectedwithanyhumanbeings.Sherousedherselftoconsidertheirexactpositionupontheturbulentmapoftheemotions.Ohyes—itwasaquestionwhetherRalphDenhamshouldliveinthecountryandwriteabookitwasgettinglatetheymustwastenomoretimeCassandraarrivedto-nightfordinnersheflinchedandrousedherself,anddiscoveredthatsheoughttobeholdingsomethinginherhands.Buttheywereempty.Sheheldthemoutwithanexclamation. “I’veleftmybagsomewhere—where?”Thegardenshadnopointsofthecompass,sofarasshewasconcerned.Shehadbeenwalkingforthemostpartongrass—thatwasallsheknew.EventheroadtotheOrchidHousehadnowsplititselfintothree.ButtherewasnobagintheOrchidHouse.Itmust,therefore,havebeenleftupontheseat.Theyretracedtheirstepsinthepreoccupiedmannerofpeoplewhohavetothinkaboutsomethingthatislost.Whatdidthisbaglooklike?Whatdiditcontain? “Apurse—aticket—someletters,papers,”Katharinecounted,becomingmoreagitatedassherecalledthelist.Denhamwentonquicklyinadvanceofher,andsheheardhimshoutthathehadfounditbeforeshereachedtheseat.Inordertomakesurethatallwassafeshespreadthecontentsonherknee.Itwasaqueercollection,Denhamthought,gazingwiththedeepestinterest.Loosegoldcoinsweretangledinanarrowstripoflacetherewereletterswhichsomehowsuggestedtheextremeofintimacythereweretwoorthreekeys,andlistsofcommissionsagainstwhichcrossesweresetatintervals.ButshedidnotseemsatisfieduntilshehadmadesureofacertainpapersofoldedthatDenhamcouldnotjudgewhatitcontained.InherreliefandgratitudeshebeganatoncetosaythatshehadbeenthinkingoverwhatDenhamhadtoldherofhisplans. Hecuthershort.“Don’tlet’sdiscussthatdrearybusiness.” “ButIthought—” “It’sadrearybusiness.Ioughtnevertohavebotheredyou—” “Haveyoudecided,then?” Hemadeanimpatientsound.“It’snotathingthatmatters.” Shecouldonlysayratherflatly,“Oh!” “Imeanitmatterstome,butitmatterstonooneelse.Anyhow,”hecontinued,moreamiably,“Iseenoreasonwhyyoushouldbebotheredwithotherpeople’snuisances.” Shesupposedthatshehadlethimseetooclearlyherwearinessofthissideoflife. “I’mafraidI’vebeenabsent-minded,”shebegan,rememberinghowoftenWilliamhadbroughtthischargeagainsther. “Youhaveagooddealtomakeyouabsent-minded,”hereplied. “Yes,”shereplied,flushing.“No,”shecontradictedherself.“Nothingparticular,Imean.ButIwasthinkingaboutplants.Iwasenjoyingmyself.Infact,I’veseldomenjoyedanafternoonmore.ButIwanttohearwhatyou’vesettled,ifyoudon’tmindtellingme.” “Oh,it’sallsettled,”hereplied.“I’mgoingtothisinfernalcottagetowriteaworthlessbook.” “HowIenvyyou,”shereplied,withtheutmostsincerity. “Well,cottagesaretobehadforfifteenshillingsaweek.” “Cottagesaretobehad—yes,”shereplied.“Thequestionis—”Shecheckedherself.“TworoomsareallIshouldwant,”shecontinued,withacurioussigh“oneforeating,oneforsleeping.Oh,butIshouldlikeanother,alargeoneatthetop,andalittlegardenwhereonecouldgrowflowers.Apath—so—downtoariver,oruptoawood,andtheseanotveryfaroff,sothatonecouldhearthewavesatnight.Shipsjustvanishingonthehorizon—”Shebrokeoff.“Shallyoubenearthesea?” “Mynotionofperfecthappiness,”hebegan,notreplyingtoherquestion,“istoliveasyou’vesaid.” “Well,nowyoucan.Youwillwork,Isuppose,”shecontinued“you’llworkallthemorningandagainafterteaandperhapsatnight.Youwon’thavepeoplealwayscomingaboutyoutointerrupt.” “Howfarcanonelivealone?”heasked.“Haveyoutriedever?” “Onceforthreeweeks,”shereplied.“MyfatherandmotherwereinItaly,andsomethinghappenedsothatIcouldn’tjointhem.ForthreeweeksIlivedentirelybymyself,andtheonlypersonIspoketowasastrangerinashopwhereIlunched—amanwithabeard.ThenIwentbacktomyroombymyselfand—well,IdidwhatIliked.Itdoesn’tmakemeoutanamiablecharacter,I’mafraid,”sheadded,“butIcan’tendurelivingwithotherpeople.Anoccasionalmanwithabeardisinterestinghe’sdetachedheletsmegomyway,andweknowweshallnevermeetagain.Therefore,weareperfectlysincere—athingnotpossiblewi