CHAPTER IX

KatharinedislikedtellinghermotheraboutCyril’smisbehaviorquiteasmuchasherfatherdid,andformuchthesamereasons.Theybothshrank,nervously,aspeoplefearthereportofagunonthestage,fromallthatwouldhavetobesaidonthisoccasion.Katharine,moreover,wasunabletodecidewhatshethoughtofCyril’smisbehavior.Asusual,shesawsomethingwhichherfatherandmotherdidnotsee,andtheeffectofthatsomethingwastosuspendCyril’sbehaviorinhermindwithoutanyqualificationatall.Theywouldthinkwhetheritwasgoodorbadtoheritwasmerelyathingthathadhappened. WhenKatharinereachedthestudy,Mrs.Hilberyhadalreadydippedherpenintheink. “Katharine,”shesaid,liftingitintheair,“I’vejustmadeoutsuchaqueer,strangethingaboutyourgrandfather.I’mthreeyearsandsixmonthsolderthanhewaswhenhedied.Icouldn’tverywellhavebeenhismother,butImighthavebeenhiseldersister,andthatseemstomesuchapleasantfancy.I’mgoingtostartquitefreshthismorning,andgetalotdone.” Shebeganhersentence,atanyrate,andKatharinesatdownatherowntable,untiedthebundleofoldlettersuponwhichshewasworking,smoothedthemoutabsent-mindedly,andbegantodecipherthefadedscript.Inaminuteshelookedacrossathermother,tojudgehermood.Peaceandhappinesshadrelaxedeverymuscleinherfaceherlipswerepartedveryslightly,andherbreathcameinsmooth,controlledinspirationslikethoseofachildwhoissurroundingitselfwithabuildingofbricks,andincreasinginecstasyaseachbrickisplacedinposition.SoMrs.Hilberywasraisingroundhertheskiesandtreesofthepastwitheverystrokeofherpen,andrecallingthevoicesofthedead.Quietastheroomwas,andundisturbedbythesoundsofthepresentmoment,Katharinecouldfancythatherewasadeeppoolofpasttime,andthatsheandhermotherwerebathedinthelightofsixtyyearsago.Whatcouldthepresentgive,shewondered,tocomparewiththerichcrowdofgiftsbestowedbythepast?HerewasaThursdaymorninginprocessofmanufactureeachsecondwasmintedfreshbytheclockuponthemantelpiece.Shestrainedherearsandcouldjusthear,faroff,thehootofamotor-carandtherushofwheelscomingneareranddyingawayagain,andthevoicesofmencryingoldironandvegetablesinoneofthepoorerstreetsatthebackofthehouse.Rooms,ofcourse,accumulatetheirsuggestions,andanyroominwhichonehasbeenusedtocarryonanyparticularoccupationgivesoffmemoriesofmoods,ofideas,ofposturesthathavebeenseeninitsothattoattemptanydifferentkindofworkthereisalmostimpossible. Katharinewasunconsciouslyaffected,eachtimesheenteredhermother’sroom,byalltheseinfluences,whichhadhadtheirbirthyearsago,whenshewasachild,andhadsomethingsweetandsolemnaboutthem,andconnectedthemselveswithearlymemoriesofthecavernousgloomsandsonorousechoesoftheAbbeywherehergrandfatherlayburied.Allthebooksandpictures,eventhechairsandtables,hadbelongedtohim,orhadreferencetohimeventhechinadogsonthemantelpieceandthelittleshepherdesseswiththeirsheephadbeenboughtbyhimforapennyapiecefromamanwhousedtostandwithatrayoftoysinKensingtonHighStreet,asKatharinehadoftenheardhermothertell.Oftenshehadsatinthisroom,withhermindfixedsofirmlyonthosevanishedfiguresthatshecouldalmostseethemusclesroundtheireyesandlips,andhadgiventoeachhisownvoice,withitstricksofaccent,andhiscoatandhiscravat.Oftenshehadseemedtoherselftobemovingamongthem,aninvisibleghostamongtheliving,betteracquaintedwiththemthanwithherownfriends,becausesheknewtheirsecretsandpossessedadivineforeknowledgeoftheirdestiny.Theyhadbeensounhappy,suchmuddlers,sowrong-headed,itseemedtoher.Shecouldhavetoldthemwhattodo,andwhatnottodo.Itwasamelancholyfactthattheywouldpaynoheedtoher,andwereboundtocometogriefintheirownantiquatedway.Theirbehaviorwasoftengrotesquelyirrationaltheirconventionsmonstrouslyabsurdandyet,asshebroodeduponthem,shefeltsocloselyattachedtothemthatitwasuselesstotrytopassjudgmentuponthem.Sheverynearlylostconsciousnessthatshewasaseparatebeing,withafutureofherown.Onamorningofslightdepression,suchasthis,shewouldtrytofindsomesortofcluetothemuddlewhichtheiroldletterspresentedsomereasonwhichseemedtomakeitworthwhiletothemsomeaimwhichtheykeptsteadilyinview—butshewasinterrupted. Mrs.Hilberyhadrisenfromhertable,andwasstandinglookingoutofthewindowatastringofbargesswimminguptheriver. Katharinewatchedher.SuddenlyMrs.Hilberyturnedabruptly,andexclaimed: