CHAPTER VIII.

關燈
stlyendeavoredtoturntoaccounttheeducationyouhavereceivedhere.Isaynothingofthegrieftoyourmotherandme.” “I’mverysorrybutwhatcanIdo?Ican’tstudy—that’scertain,”saidRex. “Notjustnow,perhaps.Youwillhavetomissaterm.Ihavemadearrangementsforyou—howyouaretospendthenexttwomonths.ButIconfessIamdisappointedinyou,Rex.Ithoughtyouhadmoresensethantotakeupsuchideas—tosupposethatbecauseyouhavefallenintoaverycommontrouble,suchasmostmenhavetogothrough,youareloosenedfromallbondsofduty—justasifyourbrainhadsoftenedandyouwerenolongeraresponsiblebeing.” WhatcouldRexsay?Inwardlyhewasinastateofrebellion,buthehadnoargumentstomeethisfather’sandwhilehewasfeeling,inspiteofanythingthatmightbesaid,thatheshouldliketogooffto“thecolonies”to-morrow,itlayinadeepfoldofhisconsciousnessthatheoughttofeel—ifhehadbeenabetterfellowhewouldhavefelt—moreabouthisoldties.Thisisthesortoffaithwelivebyinoursoulsicknesses. Rexgotupfromhisseat,asifheheldtheconferencetobeatanend.“Youassenttomyarrangement,then?”saidMr.Gascoigne,withthatdistinctresolutionoftonewhichseemstoholdoneinavise. TherewasalittlepausebeforeRexanswered,“I’lltrywhatIcando,sir.Ican’tpromise.”Histhoughtwas,thattryingwouldbeofnouse. HerfatherkeptAnna,holdingherfast,thoughshewantedtofollowRex.“Oh,papa,”shesaid,thetearscomingwithherwordswhenthedoorhadclosed“itisveryhardforhim.Doesn’thelookill?” “Yes,buthewillsoonbebetteritwillallblowover.Andnow,Anna,beasquietasamouseaboutitall.Neverletitbementionedwhenheisgone.” “No,papa.ButIwouldnotbelikeGwendolenforanything—tohavepeoplefallinlovewithmeso.Itisverydreadful.” AnnadarednotsaythatshewasdisappointedatnotbeingallowedtogotothecolonieswithRexbutthatwashersecretfeeling,andsheoftenafterwardwentinwardlyoverthewholeaffair,sayingtoherself,“Ishouldhavedonewithgoingout,andgloves,andcrinoline,andhavingtotalkwhenIamtakentodinner—andallthat!” Iliketomarkthetime,andconnectthecourseofindividualliveswiththehistoricstream,forallclassesofthinkers.Thiswastheperiodwhenthebroadeningofgaugeincrinolinesseemedtodemandanagitationforthegeneralenlargementofchurches,ball-rooms,andvehicles.ButAnnaGascoigne’sfigurewouldonlyallowthesizeofskirtmanufacturedforyoungladiesoffourteen.
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