Chapter V. Tom Comes Home

ozenge-box,andtheholidaysbeforethatyoulettheboatdragmyfish-linedownwhenI’dsetyoutowatchit,andyoupushedyourheadthroughmykite,allfornothing.” “ButIdidn’tmean,”saidMaggie“Icouldn’thelpit.” “Yes,youcould,”saidTom,“ifyou’dmindedwhatyouweredoing.Andyou’reanaughtygirl,andyousha’n’tgofishingwithmeto-morrow.” Withthisterribleconclusion,TomranawayfromMaggietowardthemill,meaningtogreetLukethere,andcomplaintohimofHarry. Maggiestoodmotionless,exceptfromhersobs,foraminuteortwothensheturnedroundandranintothehouse,anduptoherattic,whereshesatonthefloorandlaidherheadagainsttheworm-eatenshelf,withacrushingsenseofmisery.Tomwascomehome,andshehadthoughthowhappysheshouldbeandnowhewascrueltoher.WhatusewasanythingifTomdidn’tloveher?Oh,hewasverycruel!Hadn’tshewantedtogivehimthemoney,andsaidhowverysorryshewas?Sheknewshewasnaughtytohermother,butshehadneverbeennaughtytoTom—hadnevermeanttobenaughtytohim. “Oh,heiscruel!”Maggiesobbedaloud,findingawretchedpleasureinthehollowresonancethatcamethroughthelongemptyspaceoftheattic.SheneverthoughtofbeatingorgrindingherFetishshewastoomiserabletobeangry. Thesebittersorrowsofchildhood!whensorrowisallnewandstrange,whenhopehasnotyetgotwingstoflybeyondthedaysandweeks,andthespacefromsummertosummerseemsmeasureless. Maggiesoonthoughtshehadbeenhoursintheattic,anditmustbetea-time,andtheywereallhavingtheirtea,andnotthinkingofher.Well,then,shewouldstayupthereandstarveherself,—hideherselfbehindthetub,andstaythereallnight,—andthentheywouldallbefrightened,andTomwouldbesorry.ThusMaggiethoughtintheprideofherheart,asshecreptbehindthetubbutpresentlyshebegantocryagainattheideathattheydidn’tmindherbeingthere.IfshewentdownagaintoTomnow—wouldheforgiveher?Perhapsherfatherwouldbethere,andhewouldtakeherpart.ButthenshewantedTomtoforgiveherbecausehelovedher,notbecausehisfathertoldhim.No,shewouldnevergodownifTomdidn’tcometofetchher.Thisresolutionlastedingreatintensityforfivedarkminutesbehindthetubbutthentheneedofbeingloved—thestrongestneedinpoorMaggie’snature—begantowrestlewithherpride,andsoonthrewit.Shecreptfrombehindhertubintothetwilightofthelongattic,butjustthensheheardaquickfoot-steponthestairs. TomhadbeentoomuchinterestedinhistalkwithLuke,ingoingtheroundofthepremises,walkinginandoutwherehepleased,andwhittlingstickswithoutanyparticularreason,—exceptthathedidn’twhittlesticksatschool,—tothinkofMaggieandtheeffecthisangerhadproducedonher.Hemeanttopunishher,andthatbusinesshavingbeenperformed,heoccupiedhimselfwithothermatters,likeapracticalperson.Butwhenhehadbeencalledintotea,hisfathersaid,“Why,where’sthelittlewench?”andMrsTulliver,almostatthesamemoment,said,“Where’syourlittlesister?”—bothofthemhavingsupposedthatMaggieandTomhadbeentogetheralltheafternoon. “Idon’tknow,”saidTom.Hedidn’twantto“tell”ofMaggie,thoughhewasangrywithherforTomTulliverwasaladofhonour. “What!hasn’tshebeenplayingwithyouallthiswhile?”saidthefather.“She’dbeenthinkingo’nothingbutyourcominghome.” “Ihaven’tseenherthistwohours,”saysTom,commencingontheplumcake. “Goodnessheartshe’sgotdrownded!”exclaimedMrsTulliver,risingfromherseatandrunningtothewindow. “Howcouldyouletherdoso?”sheadded,asbecameafearfulwoman,accusingshedidn’tknowwhomofshedidn’tknowwhat. “Nay,nay,she’snonedrownded,”saidMrTulliver.“You’vebeennaughtytoher,Idoubt,Tom?” “I’msureIhaven’t,father,”saidTom,indignantly.“Ithinkshe’sinthehouse.” “Perhapsupinthatattic,”saidMrsTulliver,“a-singingandtalkingtoherself,andforgettingallaboutmeal-times.” “Yougoandfetchherdown,Tom,”saidMrTulliver,rathersharply,—hisperspicacityorhisfatherlyfondnessforMaggiemaking