CHAPTER V

OfcourseshemustbuytheteainUncleBenjamin’sgrocery-store.Tobuyitanywhereelsewasunthinkable.YetValancyhatedtogotoUncleBenjamin’sstoreonhertwenty-ninthbirthday.Therewasnohopethathewouldnotrememberit. “Why,”demandedUncleBenjamin,leeringly,ashetieduphertea,“areyoungladieslikebadgrammarians?” Valancy,withUncleBenjamin’swillinthebackgroundofhermind,saidmeekly,“Idon’tknow.Why?” “Because,”chuckledUncleBenjamin,“theycan’tdeclinematrimony.” Thetwoclerks,JoeHammondandClaudeBertram,chuckledalso,andValancydislikedthemalittlemorethanever.OnthefirstdayClaudeBertramhadseenherinthestoreshehadheardhimwhispertoJoe,“Whoisthat?”AndJoehadsaid,“ValancyStirling—oneoftheDeerwoodoldmaids.”“Curableorincurable?”Claudehadaskedwithasnicker,evidentlythinkingthequestionveryclever.Valancysmartedanewwiththestingofthatoldrecollection. “Twenty-nine,”UncleBenjaminwassaying.“Dearme,Doss,you’redangerouslynearthesecondcornerandnoteventhinkingofgettingmarriedyet.Twenty-nine.Itseemsimpossible.” ThenUncleBenjaminsaidanoriginalthing.UncleBenjaminsaid,“Howtimedoesfly!” “Ithinkitcrawls,”saidValancypassionately.PassionwassoalientoUncleBenjamin’sconceptionofValancythathedidn’tknowwhattomakeofher.Tocoverhisconfusion,heaskedanotherconundrumashetiedupherbeans—CousinStickleshadrememberedatthelastmomentthattheymusthavebeans.Beanswerecheapandfilling. “Whattwoagesareapttoproveillusory?”askedUncleBenjaminand,notwaitingforValancyto“giveitup,”headded,“Mir-ageandmarriage.” “M-i-r-a-g-eispronouncedmirazh,”saidValancyshortly,pickingupherteaandherbeans.Forthemomentshedidnotcarewhethe