CHAPTER TWELVE
關燈
小
中
大
eoverroughergroundbyherside.ShehadbeenleftmotherlessattheageoffourandtheParkwasvast.
"Oneneverseemedabletogetoutofit,"shelaughed.Ofcoursetherewasthelibrary,anddearMr.Jones,andnotionsaboutthings."Iusedtostrayintothekitchenandsituponthebutler'sknees,"shelaughed,sadlythough.
Jacobthoughtthatifhehadbeentherehewouldhavesavedherforshehadbeenexposedtogreatdangers,hefelt,and,hethoughttohimself,"Peoplewouldn'tunderstandawomantalkingasshetalks."
Shemadelittleoftheroughnessofthehillandworebreeches,hesaw,underhershortskirts.
"WomenlikeFannyElmerdon't,"hethought."What's-her-nameCarslakedidn'tyettheypretend…"
Mrs.Williamssaidthingsstraightout.Hewassurprisedbyhisownknowledgeoftherulesofbehaviourhowmuchmorecanbesaidthanonethoughthowopenonecanbewithawomanandhowlittlehehadknownhimselfbefore.
Evanjoinedthemontheroadandastheydrovealonguphillanddownhill(forGreeceisinastateofeffervescence,yetastonishinglyclean-cut,atreelessland,whereyouseethegroundbetweentheblades,eachhillcutandshapedandoutlinedasoftenasnotagainstsparklingdeepbluewaters,islandswhiteassandfloatingonthehorizon,occasionalgrovesofpalmtreesstandinginthevalleys,whicharescatteredwithblackgoats,spottedwithlittleolivetreesandsometimeshavewhitehollows,rayedandcriss-crossed,intheirflanks),astheydroveuphillanddownhescowledinthecornerofthecarriage,withhispawsotightlyclosedthattheskinwasstretchedbetweentheknucklesandthelittlehairsstoodupright.Sandrarodeopposite,dominant,likeaVictorypreparedtoflingintotheair.
"Heartless!"thoughtEvan(whichwasuntrue).
"Brainless!"hesuspected(andthatwasnottrueeither)."Still…!"Heenviedher.
WhenbedtimecamethedifficultywastowritetoBonamy,Jacobfound.YethehadseenSalamis,andMarathoninthedistance.PooroldBonamy!Notherewassomethingqueeraboutit.HecouldnotwritetoBonamy.
"IshallgotoAthensallthesame,"heresolved,lookingveryset,withthishookdragginginhisside.
TheWilliamseshadalreadybeentoAthens.
Athensisstillquitecapableofstrikingayoungmanastheoddestcombination,themostincongruousassortment.Nowitissuburbannowimmortal.Nowcheapcontinentaljewelleryislaiduponplushtrays.Nowthestatelywomanstandsnaked,saveforawaveofdraperyabovetheknee.Noformcanhesetonhissensationsashestrolls,oneblazingafternoon,alongtheParisianboulevardandskipsoutofthewayoftheroyallandauwhich,lookingindescribablyramshackle,rattlesalongthepittedroadway,salutedbycitizensofbothsexescheaplydressedinbowlerhatsandcontinentalcostumesthoughashepherdinkilt,cap,andgaitersverynearlydriveshisherdofgoatsbetweentheroyalwheelsandallthetimetheAcropolissurgesintotheair,raisesitselfabovethetown,likealargeimmobilewavewiththeyellowcolumnsoftheParthenonfirmlyplanteduponit.
TheyellowcolumnsoftheParthenonaretobeseenatallhoursofthedayfirmlyplantedupontheAcropolisthoughatsunset,whentheshipsinthePiraeusfiretheirguns,abellrings,amaninuniform(thewaistcoatunbuttoned)appearsandthewomenrolluptheblackstockingswhichtheyareknittingintheshadowofthecolumns,calltothechildren,andtroopoffdownthehillbacktotheirhouses.
Theretheyareagain,thepillars,thepediment,theTempleofVictoryandtheErechtheum,setonatawnyrockcleftwithshadows,directlyyouunlatchyourshuttersinthemorningand,leaningout,heartheclatter,theclamour,thewhipcrackinginthestreetbelow.Theretheyare.
Theextremedefinitenesswithwhichtheystand,nowabrilliantwhite,againyellow,andinsomelightsred,imposesideasofdurability,oftheemergencethroughtheearthofsomespiritualenergyelsewheredissipatedineleganttrifles.Butthisdurabilityexistsquiteindependentlyofouradmiration.Althoughthebeautyissufficientlyhumanetoweakenus,tostirthedeepdepositofmud—memories,abandonments,regrets,sentimentaldevotions—theParthenonisseparatefromallthatandifyouconsiderhowithasstoodoutallnight,forcenturies,youbegintoconnecttheblaze(atmiddaytheglareisdazzlingandthefriezealmostinvisible)withtheideathatperhapsitisbeautyalonethatisimmortal.
Addedtothis,comparedwiththeblisteredstucco,thenewlovesongsraspedouttothestrumofguitarandgramophone,andthemobileyetinsignificantfacesofthestreet,theParthenonisreallyastonishinginitssilentcomposurewhichissovigorousthat,farfrombeingdecayed,theParthenonappears,onthecontrary,likelytooutlasttheentireworld.
"AndtheGreeks,likesensiblemen,neverbotheredtofinishthebacksoftheirstatues,"saidJacob,shadinghiseyesandobservingthatthesideofthefigurewhichisturnedawayfromviewisleftintherough.
Henotedtheslightirregularityinthelineofthestepswhich"theartisticsenseoftheGreekspreferredtomathematicalaccuracy,"hereadinhisguide-book.
HestoodontheexactspotwherethegreatstatueofAthenausedtostand,andidentifiedthemorefamouslandmarksofthescenebeneath.
Inshorthewasaccurateanddiligentbutprofoundlymorose.Moreoverhewaspesteredbyguides.ThiswasonMonday.
ButonWednesdayhewroteatelegramtoBonamy,tellinghimtocomeatonce.Andthenhecrumpleditinhishandandthrewitinthegutter.
"Foronethinghewouldn'tcome,"hethought."AndthenIdaresaythissortofthingwearsoff.""Thissortofthing"beingthatuneasy,painfulfeeling,somethinglikeselfishness—onewishesalmostthatthethingwouldstop—itisgettingmoreandmorebeyondwhatispossible—"IfitgoesonmuchlongerIshan'tbeabletocopewithit—butifsomeoneelsewereseeingitatthesametime—BonamyisstuffedinhisroominLincoln'sInn—oh,Isay,damnitall,Isay,"—thesightofHymettus,Pentelicus,Lycabettusononeside,andtheseaontheother,asonestandsintheParthenonatsunset,theskypinkfeathered,theplainallcolours,themarbletawnyinone'seyes,isthusoppressive.LuckilyJacobhadlittlesenseofpersonalassociationheseldomthoughtofPlatoorSocratesinthefleshontheotherhandhisfeelingforarchitecturewasverystronghepreferredstatuestopicturesandhewasbeginningtothinkagreatdealabouttheproblemsofcivilization,whichweresolved,ofcourse,soveryremarkablybytheancientGreeks,thoughtheirsolutionisnohelptous.ThenthehookgaveagreattuginhissideashelayinbedonWednesdaynightandheturnedoverwithadesperatesortoftumble,rememberingSandraWentworthWilliamswithwhomhewasinlove.
NextdayheclimbedPentelicus.
ThedayafterhewentuptotheAcropolis.Thehourwasearlytheplacealmostdesertedandpossiblytherewasthunderintheair.ButthesunstruckfullupontheAcropolis.
Jacob'sintentionwastositdownandread,and,findingadrumofmarbleconvenientlyplaced,fromwhichMarathoncouldbeseen,andyetitwasintheshade,whiletheErechtheumblazedwhiteinfrontofhim,therehesat.Andafterreadingapageheputhisthumbinhisbook.Whynotrulecountriesinthewaytheyshouldberuled?Andhereadagain.
NodoubthispositionthereoverlookingMarathonsomehowraisedhisspirits.Oritmayhavebeenthataslowcapaciousbrainhasthesemomentsofflowering.Orhehad,insensibly,whilehewasabroad,gotintothewayofthinkingaboutpolitics.
Andthenlookingupandseeingthesharpoutline,hismeditationsweregivenanextraordinaryedgeGreecewasovertheParthenoninruinsyettherehewas.
(Ladieswithgreenandwhiteumbrellaspassedthroughthecourtyard—FrenchladiesontheirwaytojointheirhusbandsinConstantinople.)
Jacobreadonagain.Andlayingthebookonthegroundhebegan,asifinspiredbywhathehadread,towriteanoteupontheimportanceofhistory—upondemocracy—oneofthosescribblesuponwhichtheworkofalifetimemaybebasedoragain,itfallsoutofabooktwentyyearslater,andonecan'trememberawordofit.Itisalittlepainful.Ithadbetterbeburnt.
JacobwrotebegantodrawastraightnosewhenalltheFrenchladiesopeningandshuttingtheirumbrellasjustbeneathhimexclaimed,lookingatthesky,thatonedidnotknowwhattoexpect—rainorfineweather?
JacobgotupandstrolledacrosstotheErechtheum.Therearestillseveralwomenstandingthereholdingtheroofontheirheads.Jacobstraightenedhimselfslightlyforstabilityandbalanceaffectthebodyfirst.Thesestatuesannulledthingsso!Hestaredatthem,thenturned,andtherewasMadameLucienGraveperchedonablockofmarblewithherkodakpointedathishead.Ofcourseshejumpeddown,inspiteofherage,herfigure,andhertightboots—having,nowthatherdaughterwasmarried,lapsedwithaluxuriousabandonment,grandenoughinitsway,intothefleshygrotesqueshejumpeddown,butnotbeforeJacobhadseenher.
"Damnthesewomen—damnthesewomen!"hethought.AndhewenttofetchhisbookwhichhehadleftlyingonthegroundintheParthenon.
"Howtheyspoilthings,"hemurmured,leaningagainstoneofthepillars,pressinghisbooktightbetweenhisarmandhisside.(Asfortheweather,nodoubtthestormwouldbreaksoonAthenswasundercloud.)
"Itisthosedamnedwomen,"saidJacob,withoutanytraceofbitterness,butratherwithsadnessanddisappointmentthatwhatmighthavebeenshouldneverbe.
(Thisviolentdisillusionmentisgenerallytobeexpectedinyoungmenintheprimeoflife,soundofwindandlimb,whowillsoonbecomefathersoffamiliesanddirectorsofbanks.)
Then,makingsurethattheFrenchwomenhadgone,andlookingcautiouslyroundhim,JacobstrolledovertotheErechtheumandlookedratherfurtivelyatthegoddessontheleft-handsideholdingtheroofonherhead.SheremindedhimofSandraWentworthWilliams.Helookedather,thenlookedaway.Helookedather,thenlookedaway.Hewasextraordinarilymoved,andwiththebatteredGreeknoseinhishead,withSandrainhishead,withallsortsofthingsinhishead,offhestartedtowalkrightuptothetopofMountHymettus,alone,intheheat.
ThatveryafternoonBonamywentexpresslytotalkaboutJacobtoteawithClaraDurrantinthesquarebehindSloaneStreetwhere,onhotspringdays,therearestripedblindsoverthefrontwindows,singlehorsespawingthemacadamoutsidethedoors,andelderlygentlemeninyellowwaistcoatsringingbellsandsteppinginverypolitelywhenthemaiddemurelyrepliesthatMrs.Durrantisathome.
BonamysatwithClarainthesunnyfrontroomwiththebarrelorganpipingsweetlyou